


The Last Inquisitor

by ignitethestars



Series: The Adventures of Rey Solo [1]
Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016), Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebellion Era - All Media Types, Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Canon Divergence-Alternate Universe, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Romance, F/M, Mutual Pining, Slow Burn, Space Family Feels
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-20
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-09-10 17:46:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 21,388
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8926459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ignitethestars/pseuds/ignitethestars
Summary: After completing the mission on Scarif, Jyn is ready to meet her fate in the arms of her partner and friend, Cassian Andor. But before the Death Star's devastating blast can reach them, they're rescued by Hera Syndulla and Sabine Wren.Accompanied with Bodhi Rook, the crew begin their journey home...until they receive a distress call from Takodana: Kanan Jarrus is being hunted down by the Empire's last (and deadliest) Inquisitor.Battered and bruised, the Rogue One crew embark on a mission with the Ghost crew to save Kanan, each battling their own inner demons along the way.





	1. Skyfall is Where We Start

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! With a sort of fix it, slowburn, Star Wars fic! 
> 
> Massive thanks to hanorganaas for beta-ing this chapter and always supporting my fics!
> 
> Chapter title is taken from the Adele song, Skyfall, which is a really fitting rebelcaptain song.
> 
> Also this takes place in my Rey Solo verse, but as a sort of prequel.

Jyn Erso waited for the world to end.

She clung to Cassian Andor and watched as the sky turned into a brilliant golden hue, so bright that it made her eyes hurt.

She closed her eyes and breathed in the saltwater smell of the air. She thought of what could happen next for the Rebellion...for the whole galaxy.

The roar of the ocean and the blast of the weapon was so loud that she nearly missed Cassian’s voice: “ _ Look!” _

Jyn glanced up to see a small, battered ship as it soared above them and then descended to a point where it was hovering a few feet away from them. The hatch opened, revealing a woman wearing colorful Mandorlian armor. “What are you two waiting for? Come on!”

Jyn spared a glance at Cassian before he gave a quick nod. They stood together, Jyn helping Cassian limp toward the ship as fast as they could. She could feel the heat of the blast on her back.

“Come on!” shouted the woman, as she hopped out to help Jyn carry Cassian. The three of them stumbled up the ramp. The woman let go of Cassian long enough to close the hatch and shouted, “Go, Hera!”

The ship jerked, making Jyn and Cassian fall backwards. Cassian groaned in pain, his handsome features contorting.  “He needs help.” said Jyn, glancing up at the Mandorlian.

The woman glanced down at Cassian as the ship shuddered again. Then the whole thing went topsy turvy, jerking even worse than before.

“Hold on!” shouted a woman from the cockpit, “we’re making the jump to lightspeed-”

The force of it sent Jyn backwards, causing her to hit her head on the wall. The Mandorlian woman stepped away to collect something from a crate;she returned a second later with a med kit in hand. She knelt down beside Cassian and began nursing him back to health.

Jyn watched in silence while the woman worked. She took in her appearance for the first time. She had tawny skin, golden eyes and brightly colored hair. Her armor had bursts of purples, oranges and pinks.

“Congratulations, by the way,” said the Mandorlian, “you got the Rebellion to unite and  _ fight. _ No one else had done so.”

“You’ve never had a battle like this?” Jyn inquired, raising an eyebrow.

“Not on a scale like this,” Cassian grunted, shifting in his position as he waited for the painkillers to kick in. “Small skirmishes here and there...but it's usually just one rebel cell doing the fighting.”

“Today marked our first victory,” the Mandorlian said darkly. “But it came at a cost.”

Jyn felt the weight of the past few days’ losses suddenly hit her: Saw, her father, Kaytoo, Bodhi, Chirrut and Baze…

Were they even alive when the blast hit? Or had they already been dead? Jyn squeezed her eyes shut as she thought of those she lost.

However when she opened them, all she could focus on was what she still had, even if Cassian was swearing under his breath at the still intense pain.

“It will take a minute for the medicine to kick in. His injuries could have been much worse, but I can't do anything other than give him painkillers until we get somewhere actually stocked with medical supplies.”

“Still,” Cassian grunted, “better than dead.”

Jyn gave a weak smile. She turned when she heard soft footfalls behind, looking just in time as a woman stepped into the bay. She was a Twi'Lek with green skin and eyes that had the look of someone far older. “We’ll be back on Yavin 4 soon enough, so they both can get medical treatment.”

Jyn looked up, surprised. The Twi'Lek gave a knowing look, “You were limping.”

“It's nothing compared to his injuries,” Jyn retorted. She stood up up for no other reason than to prove she could, but the point was moot because she winced as pain shot up her leg.

The Twi'Lek gave a bemused smile, as though that was exactly what she expected Jyn to do. “I think the best thing for the three of you now would be to rest.”

“Three?” Cassian repeated, arching an eyebrow.

“Three,” confirmed Bodhi Rook stepping up beside the Twi’Lek. A sheepish and nervous grin appeared on his battered and bruised face.

A grin split across Jyn’s features, one that was matched by Cassian's smile. Her smile quickly faded; however, once she remembered that there were two people in the room that she did not know. 

“I don't even know who you are or if you are working for the Empire.” Jyn said, lifting her chin up as she spoke.

The Twi’Lek gave a dark chuckle, “Us working for the Empire? Not in a million parsecs. As for introductions, I’m Hera Syndulla.”

“And I’m Sabine, Sabine Wren,” said the Mandorlian.

Cassian appeared at Jyn’s side, resting his back against the cool wall. “They're with the Rebellion...you can trust them.”

Jyn glanced back at the two women. It wasn't easy for Jyn to trust. Everything and everyone she had put her trust in had either failed or abandoned her.

Until she met Cassian.

She nodded, “Alright then, you’re rebels, are you? Why aren't you off...rebelling right now?”

Sabine grinned, “We are. We were suppose to fall back, but we still had men on the ground; couldn't leave them behind.”

Cassian turned to Hera, “That was a huge risk.”

“So was your mission to Scarif, but you still went, and now the Rebellion has the Deathstar plans.” Hera retorted, leaving the room.

A silence fell on the room, which was soon broken by Sabine. “If you’ll follow me, I’ll show you to the rooms.”

Cassian, Jyn and Bodhi, all too exhausted to protest, trailed after Sabine.

* * *

Bodhi was to share a room with Sabine, who had quickly informed him to leave her art supplies and explosives alone. Bodhi had quickly agreed with a comment that he had no interest in being around explosives ever again. With that, he had climbed into bed.

After that, Sabine had shown Jyn and Cassian to the room they were to share. It was dark and dusty, as though it had not been used for sometime. The only piece of furniture was a bunk bed.

Jyn took the top bunk and Cassian the bottom. She took the top bunk knowing Cassian was injured and couldn’t climb up himself.

The room was quiet and dark, the only light was the faint orange shined from the bottom of the door. The hum of the engines had been enough to lull Cassian to sleep, but it hadn't been enough for Jyn.

She couldn't bring herself to close her eyes. She was too afraid of the ghosts she would see; and, oh, how many there were.

They had won, but to her it didn't feel like a victory. The ache in her chest from so many losses in one day felt like the very opposite of victory.

_ The strongest hearts are built from Kyber. _

Jyn squeezed her eyes shut and swallowed a sob. Chirrut...Baze...Kaytoo...Saw...her father.

It felt to her as though her heart had been shattered and that the world had been flipped upside down. Despite the fact that she could hear Cassian's soft breathing on the bunk below her, Jyn felt as alone now as she did waiting days for Saw Gerra to rescue her.

She rolled closer to the wall as tears worked their way down her cheeks. Hatred burned through her like a swig of Correllian whiskey; she wanted the Empire’s entire foundation crumble and break for the suffering they caused.

When sleep claimed her, it was an uneasy one filled with nightmares.

* * *

Hera Syndulla sighed as she leaned back in her seat and closed her eyes. The only thing she was missing was the vast maelstrom that was hyperspace.

_ The Ghost  _ felt eerily quiet, even with their new guests. She missed the frustrated chirps from Chopper, the clashes between Zeb and Ezra, and she especially missed Kanan. She missed his presence, his occasional arrogance, his kindness and… even his stupid jokes.

The war had changed everything. The Rebellion had faced devastating losses before Scarif, and they would after Scarif. It was a simple fact. People would die fighting for the cause they believed in; to restore peace and hope in the galaxy.

Hera wasn't fully aware of what had gone down on Scarif, not on the ground anyway. She knew it had been hell in the sky; she had lost count how many pilots they had lost.

But given Cassian's wounds and the haunted look in Jyn and Bodhi’s eyes, Hera guessed it had been just as bad, if not worse.

A beeping noise brought her out of her thoughts. Hera opened her eyes to see a distress signal flashing. She typed in controls as she tried to determine the origin of the signal.

Her eyes went wide. She recognized the numbers on screen immediately.

* * *

Jyn woke up with a start. A fresh wave of panic hit her when she didn't immediately recognize her surroundings. But then the memories of the past few days washed over her and realized she was still on Hera and Sabine's ship.

It took her a minute to control her breathing, trying to force away the images that kept replaying in her head: Lyra Erso falling down onto the muddy ground, shot dead by Orson Krennic. Galen Erso staring up at her, clothes and hair soaked from the rain, the light fading in his eyes. Saw telling her to go, to save the dream, dust falling around him. The sky turning a vibrant gold, death barreling toward her like a podracer.

Jyn took another deep breath, trying to focus on something--anything--else. She turned to focus on the sound of Cassian's breathing, which was still ragged from his fall.

Three nights ago, she didn't give a damn about the Rebellion or the Empire. The only thing she cared about was what happened to her, the rest of the galaxy could kriff off for the suffering it caused her.

But now?

Now she had more than just herself to care about. She had Cassian and Bodhi, two men who had helped make sure her father’s death was not in vain.

She had something to fight for--and, for once, it wasn't out of revenge.

Jyn was startled out of her thoughts by a noise coming from below: a grunt, followed by mumbling.

Worried that the fall had done worse damage than they had originally guessed, Jyn hopped off the top of the bunk to find Cassian clenching at the bed sheets. His face contorted into some expression she couldn't understand.

She shook his arm gently, praying to all the forces in the galaxy that it wouldn't make the pain of his wounds worse. “Cassian,  _ Cassian.” _

His eyes opened and his body bolted upright. Jyn leapt backwards before their foreheads collided together. She lost her footing when she did. Her arms cartwheeled in the air for a second before gravity took over. Then she hit the floor with a soft  _ thump. _

On the bed, Cassian groaned. He clutched at his ribs which must have flared up with pain from his his body abruptly sitting up.

“Are you okay?” He asked softly, as his eyes flashed in concern.

Jyn looked up arching an eyebrow, “You're the one with the possibly broken ribs, you tell me.”

Cassian chuckled but stopped when his chuckle was followed by a groan, “They're not broken...I’ve had those before. I think they're just bruised.” He shifted a bit, adjusting his back against the wall.

Jyn stood up. She took a sharp inhale as pain shot up her leg. Grinding her teeth, she limped over to the bed and sat down at the edge. “Care to explain why you were mumbling in your sleep? Or is that a regular habit?”

“I don't know if it's a regular habit, you'd have to ask Kaytoo about that-” Cassian froze at his slip up and the losses of the battle struck Jyn once more. The look on Cassian's face made it worse. He cleared his throat and met Jyn’s unwavering gaze. “Why are you up?”

The abrupt subject change was not lost on Jyn. Figuring it was Cassian's way of dealing with grief, she went along with it. “Nightmares…lots of them.”

Cassian reached out and took her hand in his. As their fingers interlaced, Jyn felt her heart speed up. It was one thing to hold hands and cling to each other when they were about to die, but to hold hands like this?

She had seen moments like this before. Long before the Empire took away her family, she had seen Lyra Erso reach out and take Galen Erso’s hand, a soft expression on her face and a smiling splaying across her features

It was a softness that was now mirrored on Cassian's face. Jyn opened her mouth to say something--anything--but the door slid open and Bodhi popped his head in. “Hera needs us.”

Jyn glanced back at Cassian. He nodded. She released his hand and stood up, allowing him room to slide off the bed. He groaned when he stood, wobbling slightly. Bodhi hurried in, grabbing one of Cassian's arms and wrapping it around his neck. “Don't worry,” said Bodhi, “I’ve got you.”

“I appreciate it,” Cassian responded as the two stumbled out of the room. Jyn limped after them.

“Did Hera say what was going on?”

“She said it was a distress call from an old friend,” Bodhi replied. The three of them worked their way to the cockpit.

As they walked, Jyn had the sneaking suspicion that their mission wasn’t over yet.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you all enjoyed the chapter! Feel free to leave comments; I would love to hear feedback.
> 
> If anyone is interested in sending me fic prompts, let me know! You can find me on tumblr at jynncassian!


	2. All the Days They Stay Dead...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Rogue One and the Ghost crew receive a call for help from Takodana, but before they can make the jump to lightspeed, they're caught in an ambush...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy New Year, everyone!
> 
> A small heads up about this chapter: at the time of writing it, the devastating news of Carrie Fisher and Debbie Reynolds' deaths broke. In the end, this ended up being a heavier chapter than anticipated. So, this chapter is dedicated to these lovely ladies who were such an integral part of my childhood. Rest in peace.
> 
> Special thanks to Nor (hanorganaas) for being a constant source of friendship, inspiration, and encouragement, as well as editing this chapter. 
> 
> And major thanks to Nikki for helping me pick out a title for this chapter, as well as putting up with my weirdness for the past two years. 
> 
> Title of this chapter is taken from one of the quotes from the Doctor Who episode "Heaven Sent".

“What's going on?” Jyn asked as they entered the cockpit. Hera was sitting in the pilot's seat, rubbing her forehead. Sabine stood across from her as she leaned against the copilot's seat.

“We received a holographic message,” Hera announced. “It was a call for help.”

“From the Rebellion?” Cassian asked, still leaning against Bodhi for support.

Hera shared a glance with Sabine; the two seemed to have a silent conversation and with a curt nod, it ceased when Hera turned back to Jyn, Cassian and Bodhi.

“The message we received was from a man named Kanan Jarrus. He  _ was _ a member of the Rebellion, but he left a year ago.”

“Why did he leave?” asked Bodhi sporting a frown. 

“Does it matter?” Sabine answered in a clipped voice, her golden eyes narrowed. Bodhi shook his head hurriedly and averted his gaze. He focused on the floor instead.

“What did the message say?”Cassian inquired, leaning away from Bodhi. The former Imperial pilot glanced warily at Cassian and kept close to him, in case the captain needed any further help.

Hera turned in her seat and pressed a button on the control panel. “Why don't you hear for yourself?” 

A blue hologram appeared in the middle of the room. Jyn took an unconscious step forward and studied the man in the hologram. He had long hair, pulled back into a ponytail  with  a visor over his eyes. His shoulders sagged and Jyn, even from the hologram, got the sense of a weary soldier, fresh from a war. 

“ _ Hera...I’m not sure I’ll still be alive when you get this message, but I had to give it a shot. I’m in danger. The Empire has sent an Inquisitor to Takodana...I fought with him once and he’s almost as strong as the Grand Inquisitor.” _

Jyn, leaning toward Cassian, whispered, “What's an Inquisitor?”

It was Bodhi who answered: “A fancy term for an assassin. They hunt down Force Sensitive people; including children.”

Jyn clenched her fists.Then she spoke, her voice was uneven with anger. “ _ Children?” _

Bodhi nodded glumly and turned his attention back to the hologram. Cassian stared fixedly at the image as well, something akin to regret written on his face. 

Jyn swallowed hard, forcing herself to look back at the message.

“ _ Hera, please, I need your help...I need  _ the Ghost.  _ I can't do this without- _ ” Suddenly, Kanan looked up before turning at something off screen, his shoulders tense. “ _ Someone's here. Hera, I need-” _ Then the hologram flickered and disappeared completely. 

A deafening silence had overcome the room. Jyn and Bodhi stared at the spot where Kanan Jarrus’ hologram figure had just been. Sabine had her back turned, arms folded. Cassian was watching Hera. The woman was staring fixedly at the ground.

“We’re going after him, right?” Bodhi asked, looking back and forth at the others. Hera looked up witha solemn expression on her face.

“He could already be dead and the three of you are in no condition to go to Takodana.”

“Yes we are,” Cassian said. All eyes had turned to him. “I’ve had broken legs, arms and ribs before but still completed the mission.”

Hera opened her mouth to argue, yet was interrupted when Jyn spoke up. “I’ve lived on my own most of my life without medkits and bacta tanks to heal me when I fell down; this leg won't stop me in a fight.”

Bodhi stared at Jyn and Cassian as he raised his eyebrows. Slowly, he turned to face Hera and shrugged, “I can help, too. I’m not a crackshot with a blaster, but I can pilot and fix things. I also know Imperial techniques.”

Hera’s gaze remained fixed on Bodhi for a long moment. Her expression was as stony as any marble figure Jyn had ever seen. The room itself had grown quiet, but the energy in the room felt similar to that as the one in the briefing room back on Yavin. The anticipation radiated off every individual present. 

“Takodana here we come.” Hera finally said, a small smile playing at her lips. Sabine grinned, exiting the room with the announcement that they would need armor, gear, and weapons.

Bodhi looked apprehensive at the mention of weapons, but gave Jyn a wide smile and held his hand up with his palm out. With a roll of her eyes, Jyn slammed her palm against his eliciting a loud clap. 

As Hera turned around to set their coordinates, The three Rogue One members dispersed from the room. Bodhi went in search for Sabine to help her.

Jyn limped toward the round table in the corner and sank down into the booth. Cassian followed her lead before sitting down next to her. He edged away slightly to give her some personal space.

“Who do you think Kanan was?” Jyn asked softly. She tilted her head up to meet Cassian's warm brown eyes. She was surprised to find that he was watching her with a sort of tenderness that brought her back to the elevator on Scarif.

She remembered the elevator descending back down to ground level. Jyn had studied the planes of Cassian's warm, bronze face; the arch of his eyebrows and the color of his eyes. She had gotten the bizarre urge to kiss him then, however she hadn’t.    
  


The sound of his voice reeled her back into the present. It took Jyn a second to realize that he was answering her question.

“He was a Jedi, the last of the Jedi. He fought relentlessly with the Rebellion for several years, until one mission went wrong. They lost two members of their team...then Kanan disappeared. No one knew where for Force knows how long.” 

Jyn thought of how cold and dusty the room she and Cassian had slept in was when they first walked in. Perhaps, the room had belonged to the two members they had lost?

“Everyone's lost something in this war haven't they?” Jyn murmured, thinking of her parents. Instead of the warm memories that she use to blanket herself with as a child, all she could picture in her mind’s eye now were her parents’ lifeless bodies.

“War takes and it takes and it takes,” Cassian responded. “It’s never been known to be much of a giver.”

A quietness fell upon the room. Jyn thought of Kanan. She felt as if she understood him in a way. After everything that had happened to her, she had run away too. She ran from the ghosts of her past, the Empire, the knowledge of the world she was living in.

It had worked pretty well too, until a man from the Rebellion came and rescued her. Then she had to go running  _ to _ all the things she had left behind. She knew that, if given the chance, she would do it all again. 

* * *

Bodhi paused when he reached Sabine's room. Although he had taken a well deserved nap in there earlier, he wasn't sure if he was allowed in. Nor did he know how big a chance there was of having an unfortunate encounter with one of Sabine’s “projects.”

Hesitantly, he knocked thrice on the steel door before leaned away with bated breath. But no explosions occurred, much to Bodhi's relief.

Sabine stared at him with a bemused expression on her face asking: “Why do you look like you’re about to go head first into a Rancor’s den?”

Bodhi scratched the back of his head with one hand. He jerked a finger in the direction of Sabine's collection of explosives. They were scattered around along with medkits and blasters from her attempt to gather up their resources. “Well.. I wasn't sure if the door would, you know...go boom.”

Sabine rolled her eyes and stepped aside to let him in. For the second time that day, Bodhi became enamoured by the various drawings and paintings that were littered around the room. The style varied. Sometimes they aimed for realism, other times aiming for something out of a children's cartoon. If there was one connecting thread, one telltale sign that Sabine had been the one to paint them, it was the vibrant colors.

“Plus I thought you could use a hand.” Bodhi said, stepping around the weapons like he was crossing a minefield (which he basically was). He sat down on the edge of her bed before putting his hands on his lap. “So, uh, what can I do?”

“Do you know how to fire a blaster?” Sabine asked, picking one up off the floor. She held it firmly and purposely. Bodhi eyed the weapon nervously. 

“Er, no. I don't.”

Sabine gave a disbelieving look before inquiring. “You were with the Empire and they  _ never _ taught you to fire a weapon?”

Bodhi groaned and pinched the fabric of his pants. “There might have been  _ one _ training session.”

“Good,” Sabine said. She thrust the blaster into his hands. He gulped, holding it up like it was a bomb about to go off. Sabine pointed at the blaster, “Keep that with you, you never know what you’ll get on Takodana.”

Bodhi stared dumbfoundedly at the blaster for a second before meeting Sabine's unwavering gaze. “Exactly how dangerous  _ is  _ Takodana?”

“It brings in a crowd; some good, some bad,  but it's best to make sure they know not to mess with you.” She paused and gestured at the blaster. “So keep that with you.”

Bodhi nodded and carefully sat the blaster down on the bed. Sabine continued to set aside blasters and explosives (there seemed to be a system of some sort, but Bodhi wasn't sure what), Bodhi pulled together all the medkits and started packing them into satchels.

“You're not a soldier, aren’t you?” Sabine asked, breaking the silence. Bodhi laughed.

“I’m not much of a fighter. I’m a pilot, though. A pretty good one, too.”

Sabine smiled, but it didn't reach her eyes. It seemed that she had finished organizing. She had moved on to fiddling around with bits and bobs on her desk. Bodhi watched her for a long moment, recognizing the look in her eye. He saw the same look in far too many people nowadays. If he got the chance to, Bodhi figured that he would see the same look in  _ his _ eye.

“Who did you lose?” Bodhi finally asked, after a moment of indecision

Sabine paused and turned to glare at Bodhi. “What makes you think I’ve lost anyone?”

Bodhi took a deep breath before answering. “I-I just...I know what grief looks like.”

Sabine huffed in annoyance and sat down on the bed next to him. “Two friends died saving Hera, Kanan and I. We couldn't even give them a proper burial because there weren't any bodies. After that, Kanan left, and it was just me, Hera and Chopper.”

“Chopper?”

“A very temperamental droid,” Sabine explained. “He’s back on Yavin fixing things when he feels like it.” She sighed as her shoulders sagged. “It’s just not the same without them.”

Bodhi bit his bottom lip.  He wasn’t sure of what he could say. What could anyone say? Finally the answer came to him. Something his father had told him when his grandmother died. “Everything ends. People come and go. But...but the impact they had on us...it uh, never ends. They made our lives better, made us better people, gave us hope and made us smile. So...in a way, they're never really, truly gone. We loved them and that's what makes it hurt, but that love keeps them with us, even after their story ends.”

Sabine stared at him for a moment then nodded once. She turned to look ahead of her. “I guess that's a good way of thinking about it.”

“When I was a kid I thought it was rubbish.” Bodhi admitted. “Not anymore.”

Sabine opened her mouth to reply, but then the entire ship jerked forward. It sent both she and Bodhi to the floor. “What the hell-?” Bodhi exclaimed.

Sabine stumbled to her feet. “We’re under attack.”

* * *

Jyn and Cassian stumbled into the cockpit. The ship shook violently again and Jyn lost her balance. Immediately, Cassian reached out to steady her, his hands landing gently on her waist.

She tried to ignore the surge of warmth she felt at his touch, however feather light it was, and looked out the viewport to see the inky blackness of space and the twinkling stars. “What's happening?” Jyn demanded as the ship shuddered again.

“We’re under attack.” Hera replied as she flicked switches and pulled levers. “Group of TIE fighters. They were waiting for us.”

“We’re not at Takodana yet, are we?” Jyn asked as Cassian released his feather like grip on her before making his way to the pilot seat. 

“No, I had programmed the navicomputer to send us the next system over so I could set the coordinates for Takodana. But as you can see, that plan backfired.”

“You think?” Jyn cried as the  _ Ghost _ bucked forward. She stumbled forward and grabbed onto the back of the copilots seat with a vice-like grip.

“What are you doing?” Hera asked Cassian. He was typing in controls as quickly as he could. 

“Calculating,” he answered, “so we can get out of here.”

“Good,” Hera said. “Jyn, you and Sabine get to the cannons and take out as many of those bucketheads as you can.”

Jyn nodded in acknowledgement. She turned to run out of the room but  Cassian's voice stopped her. 

“Jyn.”

She stopped in the doorway and  turned to face him. His expression was filled with anticipation, determination and concern. Not for him, no, that was always his last thought. Selfishly, Jyn wondered if his concern was directed at  _ her. _ “Good luck,” Cassian said simply. 

“You too,” Jyn replied, unable to stop drinking him in...just in case. He couldn't seen to stop either. But then the ship jerked again from another blast, reminding Jyn of the danger they were currently in. 

She ran out of the room, heart thumping wildly in her chest.  She didn't think it was just from the current battle.

* * *

The explosions were deafening as Jyn slid into the seat connected to the turret. She slid on a headpiece, her fingers grabbing  the controls.

“ _ I count ten TIEs,”  _ Sabine said  from the other line. “ _ Plus an Imperial Shuttle.” _

_ “ _ What the hell is an Imperial Shuttle doing out here?” Jyn inquired, turning the gun as she searched for a TIE. She kept an eye on her scanner.

“ _ No clue, best to shoot it down last. If we waste time on it, the TIEs will have us in pieces.” _

“We’d be screwed.” Jyn murmured. “Got it.”

Another explosion rocked the ship and then  a TIE fighter flew past Jyn’s view. She swiveled the cannon in the ship’s direction and fired. The first two shots missed completely, but the third one was a bullseye. The TIE fighter exploded into a fiery ball. Jyn, however, paid little attention as another TIE zipped by.

She waited until it went directly into her line of fire, and shot the canon. The ship went down, spiraling out of control before it too exploded.

“ _ Nice shot, Erso!” _ shouted Sabine. “ _ Six to go.” _

_ “ _ Copy that.” Jyn replied, and went in search of another TIE. Adrenaline roared through her veins. She could feel hope lift her spirits. They could do this, they would get through this…

“ _ Jyn, we’ve got-hang on...one, two, three-we’ve got four TIEs coming straight at us. They're making a final run.”  _ It was Bodhi. He must have been keeping an eye out from the cockpit. He’d gone to help Hera and Cassian if they needed it.

“‘Final run?’ What does that mean?” Jyn asked, but before Bodhi could answer, she caught sight of the TIEs. Their engines screamed as they rushed toward  _ the Ghost. _ Jyn got ready to fire, but before she could, all six TIEs fired upon them at once.

Jyn felt panic wrap around her like a cold fist as the ion blasts ripped through the ship, like the walls were as soft as butter. Warning lights began to flash and an alarm started to ring.

Jyn watched as the stars outside began to spin and felt her stomach drop as  _ the Ghost _ began to fall silently through space. It spiraled down toward an blindingly white globe below.

Jyn swallowed hard and waited for the inevitable crash. She could see the inky blackness of space fade. It turned into an icy blue color and then she was looking at thin clouds, receding in size until they were smaller than insets. 

Just as she heard Cassian frantically yelling over the comms, everything went black and the ship made its final landing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully y'all aren't too mad at me for that cliffhanger...
> 
> If you want more from this verse, check out Awakening and Legacy, which take place in the Sequel Trilogy era. Also feel free to send me fic requests on Tumblr, you can find me at leiasorganaas. 
> 
> Please feel free to leave feedback!


	3. Ambush In The Snow

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After crash landing, the Ghost and Rogue One crew prepare for battle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Major kudos to Nor (hanorganaas) for her simply amazing editing skills and for always supporting my endeavors in writing.
> 
> Prepare for an onslaught of Rebelcaptain...

When the world swam back into vision, Jyn became aware of two things: One, she was surrounded by snow, mountains of it. Outside the window, all she could see was  _ white, _ endless white. Two, she could hear Cassian's voice. He sounded frantic, which was a word Jyn wouldn't usually use to describe Cassian.

The entire ship was tilted at a bizarre angle that made it difficult to climb out of the chair. She turned in time to see Cassian appear in the doorway. 

“Jyn.” he breathed, shocked and relieved. He ran to her and ended up stumbling into her. His hands grasped onto her arms to steady himself. 

Jyn placed her hands on his sides, with a feather light touch. 

“Are you alright?” she asked as she looked for signs of any new injuries. 

“You're bleeding.” Cassian stated. He pushed a strand of hair away from her face. His own was contorted into an expression of concentration. After a moment, he sighed. “I don't think it’s a deep cut, but you should still get it-”

“I’m fine, Cassian.” Jyn interrupted. Cassian nodded and dropped his hand back down to her arm. Without thinking, she pressed her forehead against his. They both fell quiet. Their breathing slowed until their chests rose and fell at the same time. It was intoxicating  for Jyn to hold onto him with so little distance between them. It made the world fall away instantly, to where it was as if it were just the two of them.

Warmth flooded through her with a feeling of safety and  _ home _ encompassing her...

Jyn pulled away as suddenly as one would be when electrified. A flash of something akin to disappointment appeared in Cassian's eyes. Jyn did her best to ignore it but couldn’t. “How are the others?”

“Hera and Bodhi are alright, but we haven't found Sabine yet.”

Jyn moved around Cassian and limped out into the corridor. She could hear Cassian behind her. He kept a respectable distance between them. She forced away all of her conflicting thoughts of Cassian as she climbed over debris to get to the entrance of the second gun.

There was Sabine spread out haphazardly across the floor . Jyn felt her stomach drop as she rushed into the room. Jyn crouched down beside Sabine and took a sharp intake of breath, noticing the weird angle Sabine's left arm was in. There was a bruise across the girl’s forehead.

“Kriff,” whispered a voice behind her. Jyn turned to see Cassian leaning against the wall. His eyes were wide at the sight of Sabine's arm. 

Jyn turned back to Sabine and shook her slightly. 

“Sabine. Sabine, wake up.” Jyn ordered. 

Sabine's eyelids fluttered shut, then opened. It took her a second to focus on Jyn.  The moment she did, Sabine let out a sigh of relief. “You're alive.”

“So are you.” Jyn replied. 

Sabine tried to sit up but gasped. She glanced down at her arm. Her expression contorted into a gaze of horror and disgruntlement. “Karabast,” Sabine muttered. 

“Sabine!”

The Mandorlian looked up at the sound of the new voice. Relief spread across her young features once more. 

“Hera,” Sabine whispered. “You’re alright.”

The pilot of the ship made her way around Cassian and bent down next to Jyn. A tenderness appeared on Hera’s face that reminded Jyn of her mother. 

“Can't get rid of me that easily.” Hera frowned as she saw Sabine's arm. 

“Don't worry,” Sabine said jokingly, “it only hurts worse than it looks.”

“Stay here, I’ll go get a med kit.” Hera ordered as she stood up. With that, she left the room. As soon as Hera left, Sabine tried to sit up.

“Whoa, what are you doing?” Cassian demanded.

“We just crash landed after an ambush from the Empire. We won't be alone for very long.” Sabine answered.

Before either Jyn or Cassian could reply, there was a crash from outside the room. Jyn craned her neck to find that Bodhi was attempting to get back up to his feet. He stumbled into the room and cleared his throat. “The debris are absolutely furious.” 

“Good to know,” Jyn said, automatically searching for any signs of injury on him.

Bodhi froze when he saw Sabine's arm. He audibly gulped, followed by a his thumb at the exit. “Hang on.” He said, then disappeared. He returned a second later with an item that could have formerly been a blanket. 

He crouched down next to Sabine. Within a few moments, her arm was resting in a makeshift sling. Bodhi smiled at her, “I did get good marks in first aid.”

“Good to know.” Sabine chuckled.

Jyn stood up and walked over to Cassian. He looked absolutely exhausted, a weariness had settled on him that made him look older than he actually was. Jyn placed her hand on his arm. “Are you okay?”

Cassian’s eyebrows knitted together, as though he was surprised she was asking him again. After a moment, he gave a quick nod. Jyn took a small step backwards. 

“You didn't answer me earlier.” she said with a glad-you’re-okay smile. 

The corners of his mouth twitched as he pushed himself off the wall. 

“You were hurt,” he replied. “That was all that mattered.”

Jyn felt her breath catch in her throat and tried to think of something to say, but before she could think of anything, Hera appeared in the doorway. Her jaw was clenched, her mouth in a hard line.

“It’s the Empire.” Hera said, “They're here.”

* * *

 

Hera pressed the button and opened the ramp. It hissed and the gears screamed in protest as it hit the ground. A cloud of snow puffed up around it before dissipating.

Bodhi shoved crates in front of the open doorway as the rest of the crew crouched down behind them. The blaster in Jyn’s hand felt foreign. It was a spare one Hera and Sabine happened to have on hand.

Sabine sat a bag down in front of them. Grenades were practically spilling out from the top. “The TIEs landed too, so there’ll be a lot of bucketheads out there.”

“Are these standard thermal detonators?” Cassian asked as he picked one up and studied it.

“Topped with a special surprise.” Sabine confirmed.Her golden eyes sparkled with mischief and glee. 

“Here they come.” Bodhi cried, ducking behind a crate. 

Jyn looked up from behind her crate and watched as a man in a gray uniform descend down from the ramp of the Imperial shuttle. Six troopers followed behind him.

She could see the man’s graying hair from there. It was combed aside in a way that reminded her of Krennic. He was old, that much was obvious from his crinkled skin. When he spoke, his voice was loud and clear:

“Rebels! I know you are preparing to strike with whatever resources you have left from Scarif. Yes, I know you were there-but it would probably be best if you just lay down your weapons and surrender peacefully.”

“Not a chance in hell!” Jyn shouted at him.

The man gave an audible sigh. 

“I was hoping it wouldn't come to this. It's been ages since I got to take prisoners. On my command... _ fire!”  _ He ordered.

Immediately, blaster fire zipped from all directions. It flew over their heads and ricocheted off the wall into a mountain of snow.

Jyn raised her blaster and fired at the nearest stormtrooper; their black armor made them stand out in the snow like a Rathtar on a spaceship. She ducked as another trooper fired back at her.

Cassian twisted around to face the onslaught and pulled the trigger. He moved the blaster a little bit to the right and fired again. Suddenly he dropped back to the ground with a grimace. Jyn scooted toward him, her eyes wide with concern. 

“Moved the wrong way,” he groaned. “I’ll be fine.”

Jyn’s eyes bore into him and from the expression on his face, Cassian knew that she had some idea he was lying. He wouldn't be fine until they had access to bacta. Without a word, Jyn turned away from him and fired again, but the trooper dodged the blast.

She dropped back down, just as a series of blasts flew over them again. Hera and Sabine fired off several blasts at the troopers, evidently missing them however, since Sabine swore under her breath.

Jyn’s eyes fell upon the bag of explosives.

“Use the grenades!” she ordered.

“Just don't aim at the shuttle!” Bodhi shouted. “I might be able to use some of its parts to fix  _ the Ghost _ !”

Cassian grabbed one of the grenades. In one swift motion, he flung it at the small group of stormtroopers. It exploded a second later, sending up a cloud of blue, green and orange smoke.

Cassian gawked at the explosion for a moment, before turning to stare at Sabine with an astonished expression.

“Told you there was a special surprise.” Sabine said with a smirk. In unison, she and Hera stood up and shot down the remaining stormtroopers.

Jyn leapt up to her feet and fired her blaster. The man’s eyes widened in surprise before falling backwards into the snow. 

The group stood up slowly from behind their hiding place. Jyn helped Hera and Bodhi shove the crates out of the way. The brunette descended down the ramp, drinking in the sight around her. She had never seen so much snow before in her life. The wind whistled, clawing at her thin layer of clothes. Jyn looked down to see where the ramp met the ground and took a deep intake of breath as she took her first step into snow: it was cold and crunchy.

She turned to see Cassian behind her, his eyes lit up as he watched her with a faint I-can’t-believe-she’s-here expression. It was one he sported often, but usually accompanied by a look of annoyance. 

The look that followed the first was not annoyance; however, it looked far more like amazement mixed with adoration.

The sudden sound of someone swearing behind her made Jyn jump. She twisted back around to find that the man she had shot was still alive. She crept up toward him, tightening her grip on her blaster. 

The man glared up at her with contempt.

“You...you think you’ve won…” he coughed, his eyes fluttering open. It seemed to take all his energy to finish his sentence. “But the...the war...has only just...begun.” 

The last word came out a gasp and quickly the man’s body stilled. His eyes never closed and Jyn found herself hypnotized by his unseeing blue gaze.

She was brought out of her daze by a hand resting on her arm. She looked up to see that it belonged to Cassian. His brown eyes met her green ones, and Jyn found herself remembering the warmth of his embrace back on the beach…

Bodhi appeared at their side. His face scrunched up. “I really don't like the Empire. Or snow. Or the Empire in snow.”

“What if they were in the sand, would that be better?” Cassian inquired with a quirk of an eyebrow. 

“Or in an forest?” Jyn suggested innocently.

Bodhi rolled his eyes and moved past both of them and headed toward the shuttle. Jyn cleared her throat as she tried to give Cassian a convincing ‘it’s alright’ smile. He didn't seem to believe it, though, so Jyn took off after Bodhi. 

The former Imperial pilot had already cracked open one of the crates sitting in the hull. His entire face lit up as he took in the contents of the crate. He let out a whoop. 

“What is it?” Jyn asked, walking over to him. 

Bodhi flashed a ear-to-ear grin and held up something that looked rather like…

“Bacta patches!” Bodhi cried, waving the package around. “Not as good as the real thing, but a couple of these and you and Cassian will be healed.”

“What about Sabine?”

Bodhi's smile slipped before he glanced down at the crate. “I’m not sure how well the patches will work on broken bones of that extent. Certainly worth a try though.”

He tossed one at Jyn and pointed at her leg.

“Make use of it.”

Jyn nodded and limped over to sit on one of the crates. She pulled up the hem of her pants-leg, pressed the patch firmly on the area of her wound. She could feel the dull ache start to ebb away almost immediately. 

“Three whole crates of bacta patches!” Bodhi cried. “We’re  _ definitely _ in luck.”

He carefully placed the lid back on one and pushed it out of the shuttle and headed back to  _ the Ghost. _

Jyn stood up and stretched and trailed after Bodhi. She was glad that there was no longer shooting pain running up her leg with each step.

* * *

After everyone had used a bacta patch (it had numbed the pain in Sabine's arm, but it hadn't been enough to fully fix her arm), Bodhi had done a look over of  _ the Ghost _ .He happily announced that with a few days work, he would have it up and running again.

One of the major issues they were currently had was a lack of heat. The ship's heating was damaged in the crash and Bodhi couldn't immediately fix it. The group had split into pairs: Hera and Sabine went in search of personal heaters, which they claimed to have seen aboard  _ the Ghost _ not that long ago. 

Jyn huffed as she dropped the second pile of clothes and blankets into the middle of her and Cassian’s shared bunk. The area where it had been agreed that everyone would stay for the night. 

Hera instructed them to gather every blanket and article of clothing they could find to stay warm overnight. As Jyn studied the ever growing pile, she had a bad feeling that they would still all be freezing their butts off. 

“I think that's the last of it.” Cassian said, dropping a pile of clothes on top of Jyn’s. “This is not how I expected today to go.”

“Ice planets aren't your thing?” Jyn asked as she began to set up a makeshift sleeping bag with a blanket and pillow in the corner of the room. Cassian did the same, setting the second one up by the bunk bed. 

“Can’t say I’m fond of not having any heating while stranded on an ice planet, but any other time…”

They fell into an easy silence as they continued to set up the room for the night. On more than one occasion, Jyn found herself gazing at Cassian as he worked. At least once during those periods, Cassian had looked up to meet her gaze. Jyn had looked away, internally scolding herself for acting like a lovesick fool.

“Jyn?”

“Yeah?”

Cassian sank down on the edge of the bed and went quiet for a minute. 

At last he spoke again, “What are you going to do after Takodana?”

Jyn looked up, surprised. She sat the pillow in her hand before moving over toward the bed. Cassian brought his eyes up to meet hers. She was startled by how easily she was able to read him now: he was waiting for inevitable disappointment.

Exhaling softly, Jyn sat down beside him. 

“Well...I planned on going home.” she said, watching him carefully.

“Right,” he said, his forehead creasing. “That's-that’s great.”

Jyn reached over and took his hand. She entwined their fingers together as she bumped shoulders with him. Cassian lifted his head to meet her eyes. 

“Yavin 4 is home, idiot.” Jyn whispered. 

Cassian's expression brightened.He took her hand in his own and squeezed it. 

“Good,” he said. “It might get boring without you.”

Jyn chuckled and shook her head. Silence fell between them once more, but it wasn't an uncomfortable one. Cassian kept his hand in hers. His thumb rubbing gentle circles across her skin.

“Have you ever thought about the future?” Jyn asked suddenly. “After the war, I mean.”

Cassian’s eyes went round and his hand stilled in hers. He fell silent for a moment, contemplating his answer. 

“Not until recently.” He finally answered.

Jyn opened her mouth to reply, but was interrupted as the door hissed open. She looked up in time to see Hera push a square object into the room. Sabine appeared behind Hera, a smug expression on her face. 

“We found a heater.” Sabine announced.

* * *

 

_ The wind howled as the snowstorm grew worse; but she continued her trek, stumbling through the snow. It all led to this… _

_ She stopped as she caught sight of what she was looking for. It towered high into the sky. The gray stone stood proud amongst the harsh white of the land around it. The tower was ancient and forever.l A monolith that could withstand the most severe storms. _

_ She took another step forward, then another, until she found herself at the base of the tower. She raised a shaking hand and placed her palm on the freezing stone. It shuddered beneath her touch. She stumbles backwards as a crack ripped through the stone, before splitting open into a makeshift doorway… _

Jyn's eyes snapped open as she bolted upright. Her chest heaved as though she had been walking around outside in the storm. 

Suddenly, a calmness washed over her. She pulled off her blanket and stood. She grabbed a jacket and pulled it on, then left the room.

She had to find the tower.

* * *

Cassian continued to stare at the ceiling, as he had done for the past ten minutes. He couldn't stop thinking about what he had told Jyn when she asked him about the future.

His answer had surprised  _ him.  _ There had been a moment or two where he thought about being on more missions with Jyn. The more time he spent with her; however, the more he imagined a future  _ with _ her. It was foolish. Tomorrow wasn't even a promise for him; for any of them.

And yet he was still thinking about a future of being by Jyn's side. Visions of marching in and out of battles together and watching the sun rise as they sat side by side. He thought of what it would've been like if they kissed...

The sound of footsteps caught his attention. Cassian looked around for the source and found it at the door. 

_ Jyn? _

The door hissed open as she disappeared on the other side. Frowning, Cassian stood and grabbed a jacket, following her. She headed downstairs to the hull and outside into the snow.

“Jyn!” he called, but she didn't respond. 

 

Without so much as a glance back to  _ the Ghost, _ Cassian followed her into the storm.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter, another cliffhanger. Sorry about that, everyone. Hope you all enjoyed this chapter! 
> 
> If you want to see more in this series, check out Awakening and Legacy which take place in the sequel trilogy era, or just send me some fic prompts on tumblr (leiasorganaas)!
> 
> Please feel free to leave feedback!


	4. All That's Left Is A Ghost Of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jyn and Cassian find themselves on the brink of the impossible after finding a mysterious tower on the planet they're stranded on.
> 
> Between a mysterious inscription and a terrifying encounter, they begin to wonder if there isn't something more to the tower than meets the eye.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Major kudos once again to hanorganaas for being the best beta ever. 
> 
> Warning: this chapter is darker than previous ones and features several scenes that include (mostly non graphic) descriptions of death.

“Jyn!” Cassian called as he struggled to catch up with the brunette. He was certain that at least a foot of snow had fell while they were out. 

 

“Jyn, where are you going?” He shouted; however,Jyn did not respond just like every other time he had tried.

 

Cassian swore under his breath as he continued to trek through the snow. Despite the bitter remarks about going back to  _ the Ghost _ he had thought of saying earlier, Cassian knew he wasn't going to leave her out here. He would go to hell if it meant keeping Jyn safe.

 

At last, he finally caught up with her. He maneuvered around her so that he was in front of her. This didn't stop her, however, it forced Cassian to walk backwards as he spoke.

 

“Jyn, please, tell me where are you going?” Cassian inquired. His eyes searched her face for answers.

 

Her expression remained neutral. There wasn't even a flash of recognition in her eyes. It was as if he wasn't there at all. 

 

Cassian stopped moving as his breath caught in his throat. There was something wrong with Jyn...

 

The brunette pushed past him, and without a word, she continued her march through the storm. Cassian's hands shook at his sides and the icy claw of fear raked at his insides. Her figure was slowly starting to disappear within the harsh winds of the storm.

  
  


Cassian found the ability to move again and he ran after her, silently repeating her name like a mantra.He had no idea what was happening, but he wasn't going to let her go through it alone.

  
  


========================================

 

_ The tower. I have to get to the tower.  _

 

Jyn Erso marched through the blizzard, unable to think of anything but the tower. The voice that kept whispering the need, the desire.,  It did not belong to her but she trusted it nonetheless.

She could hear someone calling for her. The voice sounded as familiar as her own. Part of her longed to turn around, to reply, but the urge to get to the tower was stronger. So she continued to walk. 

Eventually Cassian, who had followed her out there, caught up with her. His warm brown eyes bore into hers. It was a silent plea for her to just say something, to answer. When Jyn gave no effort in acknowledging his presence, hurt and confusion blossomed across his handsome features. 

She had almost stopped then. She never wanted to hurt Cassian, he meant the world to her. She would go to war for him. But..

_ The tower...get to the tower. _

Jyn brushed past him and strode through the snow. She forgot about the color of Cassian's eyes and the sound of his voice.The farther she walked, the more she forgot about him...about home.

* * *

 

Just when Cassian was absolutely sure he was going to drop from exhaustion, Jyn stopped.

Cassian froze and his mouth dropped as he caught sight of where Jyn had led them. 

It was a tower that reached up to an impossible height and seemed to protrude from the ground, like a tree. The dark gray of its stone stood in stark contrast to the harsh white of the rest of the world.

Cassian's attention was brought back to Jyn. She stared at the building for a moment, then dropped to her knees. 

Cassian immediately rushed to her side and knelt beside her. He placed a tentative hand on her shoulder. Jyn looked up at him, her eyebrows scrunched together. 

“Cassian?” she whispered softly, gazing at him as though he were a cruel mirage. 

“I’m here.” Cassian promised. Relief began to flood through him. She was okay, she was okay…

“What the hell are you  _ doing  _ out here?” Jyn demanded, suddenly changing her tone and glowering at him. 

“What am  _ I _ doing out here?” Cassian repeated in disbelief. “I could ask you the same thing!”

Jyn opened her mouth to reply but promptly shut it. Her eyes darted up at the tower, then back to Cassian. The anger disappeared as suddenly as it had came. If anything, she looked lost and confused.

“I...I don't know why I’m here.” Jyn whispered, her eyes wide. “I don't remember...Cassian, I can't remember how I got here.”

Cassian's mouth went dry as he felt his stomach knot up. Stormtroopers he could handle, but this? He had no idea what was happening, what had happened, and it scared him. Without thought, he pulled her into an embrace.

Jyn stilled for a moment before wrapping her arms around his waist and burying her head into his shoulder. He pressed a kiss to the side of her head and held onto her like the world was about to end.

The world fell quiet, even the wind ceased. The ground began to rumble and Jyn pulled away from Cassian, looking around blindly for the source. Her eyes widened and Cassian followed her line of sight.

A crack had appeared at the base of the tower and was rapidly growing in width and height. Within seconds, it was as wide as a doorway. To Cassian, the shape of it disturbingly resembled the jaws of a monster.

Jyn stood up and crept toward the entrance. Cassian groaned before rising  to his feet.

“Jyn, wait!” he called. 

The brunette, however, did not wait and disappeared inside. Cassian swore and ran after her into the tower. He stopped as he took in the sight around him.

Inside was immense. The walls rose up as far as the eye could see and glinted in the faint illumination of some light source far above. Stone statues of women and men with cloaks and swords held in front of them circled around the room and pressed close against the walls. In front of them was a monument far larger than the other statues. Flanking the monument were two jagged doorways on either side. Cassian couldn't see where they led, because they were so dark.

Jyn took a step toward the monument and frowned. 

“There's something written on it.” she said, as she raised her hand to wipe away some of the dust and snow.

Cassian stepped up beside her to help. Within a few moments, they had most of it cleared off where they could read it. Jyn twisted the crystal that hung around her neck before  she read aloud:

_ “Emotion, yet peace. Ignorance, yet knowledge. Passion, yet serenity. Chaos, yet harmony. Death, yet the Force.” _

“What does that mean?” Cassian asked as he turned to face Jyn. Tonight was getting weirder and weirder.

Realization dawned on Jyn's face as she turned to face the statues once more. 

“Cassian?” She whispered in an astonished tone.

“Yeah?” Cassian replied.

“I think...I think we're inside a Jedi Temple.”

* * *

Lyra Erso had believed in the Force. As a child, Jyn sometimes wondered if her mother had some connection to the Jedi that Jyn just didn't know about. Late one night, she had asked Lyra about the Jedi and the Force.

“The Jedi were the keepers of peace in the galaxy, Stardust. They were strong and kind and very brave. They fought not for themselves, but for others.” Lyra explained.

“Whatever happened to them, mama?” Jyn asked as she clutched onto her stormtrooper doll. Her father’s friend, Krennic, gave it to her on her last birthday. Despite Jyn's distrust of the man, she had fallen in love with it.

Lyra’s gaze trailed down toward the doll, before returning to gaze  at her daughter with a sadness that Jyn couldn't fathom at that age. 

“They were betrayed by the very people they swore to protect and they...they died.”

“All of them?” Jyn asked, her eyes wide. She couldn't imagine  _ one _ of these legendary beings her mother admired and believed in so much being destroyed, let alone  _ all _ of them.

“Maybe not all of them, but most of them.” Lyra replied.

“Were you a Jedi, mama?” Jyn asked with a curiosity that overwhelmed her. Lyra’s eyes went as round as saucers and she chuckled.

“Stardust, why would you ask that?”

“You believe in the Force and the Jedi believed in the Force.” Jyn answered with a shrug. 

“You don't need to be a Jedi to believe. The Force exists in all of us, in everything. It guides us, gives us strength. The Force holds everything together.”

“That makes sense.” Jyn said with a nod. 

“I believe in the Force because where I come from, they believed in the Force. I grew up on the legends and stories of the Jedi and the Sith.”

“The Sith?” Jyn inquired, scrunching up her nose. “What is that?”

“A tale for another night.” Lyra replied as she leaned forward to press a kiss to Jyn’s brow. “Goodnight, Stardust.”

“Goodnight, Mama.” Jyn had replied. The little girl  then rolled over, clutching onto her doll, and fell asleep. That night she dreamt of mystical beings protecting the galaxy…

Over the years, her belief in the stories of the Jedi and trusting in the Force had become a challenge, if not damn near impossible. If there was a magical force keeping things right in the galaxy, then why was everything falling apart?

But as Jyn Erso looked around the room, taking in the statues of the Jedi, the echo of the words on the monument replaying in her mind...she found herself believing once more.

“A Jedi temple?” Cassian repeated, disbelief written plainly across his face. “I thought it would look more...fancy.”

“Statues at the height of three Wookies standing on top of each other not fancy enough for you?” Jyn inquired with a sardonic smile.

Cassian let out a long suffering sigh and rolled his eyes. Jyn opened her mouth to say something, but a loud thud made her jump. Suddenly the entire room went dark.

“What the hell was that?” Jyn shrieked, whirling around to locate the source of the noise. She jumped again when she felt something land on her shoulder. She twisted, ready to attack with both hands pulled into fists.

Another hand closed around her fist and a voice said: “It’s just me. Wait a moment and your eyes will adjust.”

The tension in her body dissipated at the sound of Cassian's voice. Even so, her stomach twisted as she thought of a time, so long ago, waiting in a dark place with danger lurking outside. But she had been alone, then. Alone for what had felt like an eternity, waiting on Saw. She wasn't alone now. She had Cassian with her, and he would never leave her, not by choice.

_ What if he doesn't have a choice, though. What if he dies too, like everyone else you have loved? _ whispered a cold voice in her head. 

Cassian's hand disappeared from her shoulder. Jyn's vision had begun to adjust to the light. She could make out Cassian's retreating figure as he headed toward where the exit  _ had _ been.

“The entrance has sealed up.” Cassian announced glumly. “Whatever wanted us here doesn't want us to leave.”

“What do you mean ‘whatever wanted us?’” Jyn asked as she folded her arms. “Do you think the Force brought us here?”

“Well, you walked here in a daze, didn't remember how you got here after waking up from said daze, and the tower you walked for hours to get to ended up being an old Jedi temple...that we are now stuck in. Doesn't take much to figure out the events are connected.” Cassian retorted.

Jyn rolled her eyes and sat down on the ground. She shivered as she remembered, moments too late, that the floor was covered in snow. She exhaled sharply and brought her knees up to her chest. 

Cassian sat down beside her and she instinctively scooted toward him. He held out his arm so he could wrap it around her. Jyn obliged immediately, laying  her head against his chest. He was so kriffing  _ warm… _

“There has to be another exit.” Cassian said.

“Maybe there's one on the other side of those doors-” Jyn began, but was cut off by the sound of someone screaming just beyond the aforementioned doors. 

Jyn leapt to her feet and rushed through the doorway. As soon as she did, a blast of wind knocked her to the ground. She heard a grating sound behind her. She turned to see a slab of stone slide down, effectively blocking the exit…and cutting her off from Cassian.

“Cassian!” Jyn shouted, clambering back up to her feet and hurried back to the doorway. She pulled at the edges of the stone. She looked for a switch or button to press, but all attempts were futile: the stone wouldn't budge.

Jyn let out a groan of frustration and slammed her fist against the stone. Pain shot through her hand as she let out a loud swear as she massaged her hand.

“ _ You’ll never win.” _ said a voice from behind. 

A chill ran down Jyn's spine as she turned around. Her heart thudded rapidly in her chest.

She was no longer standing in the middle of a darkened corridor. She was standing in the middle of a moist field, the ground muddy beneath her feet. The sky above was a cold gray, and rain sprinkled down with the promise of a harsher storm.

Standing in the middle of the field, in front of a man in white robes and a group of black armored stormtroopers, was Jyn’s mother, Lyra Erso. Her chin was tilted in defiance as she stared down Orson Krennic.

* * *

“Jyn!” Cassian shouted as he beat his fists against the door. “Jyn!”

“It's no use, you know.” drawed out a voice behind him. Cassian felt fear wash over him as he turned to see a man in black robes leaning against one of the statues. His face was hidden by a mask, but there was no mistaking him. It was the Inquisitor.

Immediately, Cassian reached for his blaster but came up empty. He realized he left his blaster back on  _ the Ghost. _

“Atta boy, Andor.” The Inquisitor crowed. “Always thinking with your blaster.”

“Enough.” Cassian snapped. “Why are you here? Aren't you looking for Jarrus?”

The Inquisitor pushed himself off the statue and swaggered to Cassian. He leaned in close, to the point that all Cassian could see was the Inquisitor’s mask.

“Do you still see his face when you close your eyes? Do you see  _ all _ of their faces...do you hear their screams?”

Cassian turned his head away. He felt as though he was going to be sick. 

_ His finger wrapped around the trigger. One breath, two breath… _

“Stop…” Cassian hissed.

_ He had the target in his sights. All he had to do was pull the trigger and the mission was over. _

“So you do remember.” The Inquisitor chuckled as he pulled away from Cassian. “Then again, murder is hard to forget.”

“It was suppose to hit you!” Cassian cried. “It was never meant to hit…”

“What about all the other men and women you murdered?”

Cassian winced. “I did...I did my duty.”

The Inquisitor threw his head back and laughed.

“‘I did my duty?’ Maybe Jyn wasn't wrong when she said you were no different from a stormtrooper.”

Cassian snapped his gaze back towards the Inquisitor. 

“What did you just say?” He asked.

“Oh, you heard me. Jyn Erso knows what you are...and yet you believe the two of you could have a future together, ” the Inquisitor said. “Even after you almost killed her father.”

"It’s impossible for you to know  _ any _ of that.” Cassian said shaking his head. “Which means...you're not real. You're an hallucination.”

“You got me.” The Inquisitor replied.

Cassian opened his mouth to reply, but was interrupted by the sound of a scream

_ Jyn. _

* * *

Jyn felt a flare of hatred rise through her at the sight of the man who had taken everything from her...Orson Krennic had haunted her nightmares for years. He was her own personal monster under the bed.

Lyra Erso raised a blaster and fired, hitting Krennic but not killing him. The Admiral said something to the troopers and Jyn screamed as she ran toward them, desperate to stop it from happening again…

The troopers raised their blasters and fired upon Lyra. Jyn tripped and landed on the muddy ground. She watched as her mother fell and listened as her father screamed. Krennic ordered his men to find younger her.

Jyn got up on wobbly legs and stumbled to her mother's body. But just as she reached Lyra, the scenery around Jyn changed. She was surrounded by fire. She stared down at her father's face, his eyes gazing up at her...dead. 

A sob ripped through her throat and Jyn clutched to his robes, drops of rain mixing with the tears on her face. 

“Papa,” she whispered. “No, no, no. Come on, wake up. Papa.”

The scenery changed once more. Soon she was in a dusty temple. Jyn fell backwards as the ground began to shake.

“Save the Rebellion!” screamed a man. “Save the dream!”

Jyn looked up to see Saw Gerrera striding towards a doorway, watching solemnly as the world ripped apart.

“Saw!” she shouted as she tried to make her way to him. Just as she reached him, she found herself in the middle of a forest.

_ What the hell? _

Suddenly, she heard something crackle to life behind her. Jyn turned around to see a flash of red arcing to her. Before it could go through her however, someone jumped in front of it.

It took her a second to realize who it was. When she did, Jyn's knees buckled and her vision blurred with tears. 

Disbelief and horror flooded through her, followed by a hollowness and and an ache that could not be described as anything less than devastation.

_ No, no, no, no, no… _

_ This couldn't be happening. _

_ No… _   
Lying in front of her was the body of Cassian Andor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what did you all think of Rebelcaptain and the Temple of Angst? Let me know in the comments below!
> 
> Also: the next chapter will hopefully be up within the next few days or so.
> 
> Feel free to send in fic prompts! You may find me on tumblr as "leiasorganaas"


	5. Shadows

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After they both witness mysterious visions, Cassian and Jyn briefly find solace with each other, while trying to figure out the cause of their visions. But it doesn't seem as if the Jedi Temple is done with them just yet...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this took an unexpected hiatus, sorry guys. Thankfully, I have home internet again so I can update more frequently (with graphics to go with chapters, whoo!) and I intend to start posting each Tuesday. Hopefully.
> 
> Major kudos to hanorganaas for being amazing and betaing this for me.

“Jyn!” Cassian gasped. He turned around and found the doorway that was previously blocked; was now open. 

Sparing a final glance behind him--the Inquisitor had disappeared--Cassian charged through the doorway passing down a winding hallway. 

The walls around him looked like they were made of glass; he could see his reflection staring back at him, distortedly whenever he looked around.

The screaming had stopped but had been replaced by the sound of sobs. His heart sank and he pushed himself to run faster. He cursed himself from getting separated from Jyn in the first place.

The corridor led into a much larger room. It wasn't as immense as the entrance, but it was just as grand. The ceiling was domed with an oculus: the light from it had illuminated most of the room, but left the edges of it cast in shadow. 

Snow fell from the oculus and blanketed the floor. Stools sat in a circle around the room and their bases a shade of cool gray with dull orange cushions placed in the center of the seat.

Sitting in the center of the room,was Jyn Erso, her shoulders shaking and her hair covering most of her face. She was bent over as if crying over someone's body, but there was no one in front of her.

“No, Cassian.” She whispered through sobs. “No, no, no, no, no…”

Cassian's eyes snapped back to the ground in front of her. For a brief second, he thought he saw himself lying on the ground in front of her; but as soon as it came, the image disappeared.

“Jyn.” he called out, trying to keep his voice soft. When Jyn didn’t reply, he took a few steps toward her.

The closer he got, the more details of her appearance became apparent. Her hands shook as she clutched st something. Her hair was still partially pulled into a tie, but within a few more moments, all of her hair would be free and the tie lost. 

But the worst of all was the expression on her face. She looked...devastated. Lost. Cassian took a sharp intake of breath, remembering the last time she had worn that expression. It had been right after her father was killed.

Cassian crouched down beside her and tentatively placed a hand on her shoulder. Jyn flinched and turned. Her hands were balled into fists and her body poised like a Lothal cat about to jump.

Then recognition flashed across her face. She stared at him for a long moment as if trying to convince herself he was real. At last, she threw her arms around him in a bone crushing hug. 

Cassian snaked his arms around her and squeezed his eyes shut. He took in the feeling of peace and warmth he got whenever they embraced. 

Jyn buried her face into his shoulder and clung to him desperately, as though she was afraid he would leave.

After a long moment, Cassian finally got the nerve to ask: “Jyn...what did you see?”

She went still in his arms. Cassian mentally scolded himself for even asking. But then Jyn took a shaky breath and pulled away from him. She didn't stray far, however; and took his hand in hers.

“I was back...I was back at my home, the day...the day Krennic came and took my father away...the day that...that my mother died.” Jyn whispered weakly. “And then I saw my father...and then Saw. Then I saw...I saw you.”

“Me?” Cassian asked, incredulous. 

“There was a man with a lightsaber. He was going to kill me, but you jumped in front of me.” Jyn answered. “He killed you, Cassian. Right in front of me.”

Cassian inhaled sharply. She must’ve seen the Inquisitor…if everything else she saw was real, then what if…?

No. He couldn't worry about that now. If he was to die, then he was okay with that; especially if he went down to protect Jyn. He could, somewhat ironically, live with that.

“I can't lose anyone else.” Jyn stated, her eyes blazing with defiance. “I won’t.”

“Jyn-”

“I will not have anyone else sacrifice themselves for me.” Jyn snapped. “My mother, my father...you promise me, Cassian Andor, that you won't sacrifice yourself for me.”

“Jyn, I can't promise that-”

“Yes. Yes you will.”

Cassian squeezed her hand. “If I asked you to do this, could you do it?”

Jyn ducked her head and exhaled. “No,” she muttered. “No, I couldn't.”

“I know you're tired of losing people, Jyn. I am too. But if we live in fear as opposed to appreciating what we have in front of us...then the Empire’s already won.” Cassian whispered. “We can't let them win, we have to live.”

Jyn's expression turned soft. Her eyes trailed down Cassian's face, before returning back to his eyes. 

“That's pretty wise, clever boy.” Jyn replied, leaning towards him. She pressed a kiss to his cheek and pulled away with a shrug.

Cassian stared at her for a moment, absentmindedly stroking his cheek where her lips had been a second ago. He then glanced down and noticed a crystal that hung around her neck. 

“What's that?” he asked, pointing his index finger at it. Jyn's hand wrapped around the crystal as she sighed.

“It’s a Kyber crystal. The Jedi used them to power their lightsabers.” Jyn answered. “This one belonged to my mother.”

“Was she a Jedi?” Cassian asked.

“No, but she was an expert on Kyber crystals and the Jedi...she use to tell me stories of them, when she could.” Jyn replied. “She gave me this the day she died...told me to trust in the Force. For all the good it did me.”

“You said the Jedi used it, yeah?” Cassian asked. Jyn nodded. He turned to look at the seats around them. “Maybe...maybe that thing is why we're here.”

Cassian  stood up and walked to one of the chairs.He stared hard at it for a moment. Behind the captain, Jyn stood up with her hand still wrapped around the crystal. 

“What do you mean?” she asked. “It’s a just a crystal.”

“Nothing is  _ just  _ when it comes to the Jedi. Jyn...what if your crystal brought us here, like a homing beacon.” Cassian said, moving closer to her until their chests just barely touched. “It wanted us here for a reason.”

“And what reason is that?” Jyn whispered.

“I don't know.” Cassian admitted. “But it would explain our visions.”

“You had one too?” Jyn demanded, her eyebrows shooting upward. “When were you gonna tell me?”

“When it became relevant.” Cassian stressed, “Now we have our explanation for them.”

“What? The Force?” Jyn asked, her words dripping with disbelief. “Cassian, that makes absolutely no-”

“General! General Dodonna!”

Cassian and Jyn turned simultaneously to find the source of the voice. As soon as they did, they found themselves standing in the middle of the war room in the Rebellion’s base.

A officer with umber skin ran to General Dodonna, her dark hair bouncing behind her when she stopped in front of him. Her eyes shone with unshed tears. Her face was twisted into an expression of horror. 

“Sir...we just got news...it’s Alderaan, sir. They hit Alderaan.” The Officer said.

Dodonna’s eyes widened and his expression went grim. A bald, tawny skinned man with a white beard that stood behind the General swore.

“Alderaan is a peaceful planet.” the man said venomously. “Those bloody bastards had no right to...is there word of any survivors?”

“Not yet. I’m sure there were a few people off world but…” the woman didn't seem to be able to finish the thought.

“Any word on the plans?” Dodonna asked, his brow furrowed. 

“No, sir.” The officer replied.

“Great,” said the other man. “We lost all those men for nothing.”

“Rex, you mustn't lose hope.” General Dodonna admonished. “There's still a chance-”

But then the scenery changed. Suddenly they were standing in the middle of a black hallway, red paneling underneath their feet.

“This is a prison block.” Cassian whispered, eyeing the doorways around them that were marked by number.

He stopped in front of one. It was a cell with the number ‘2187’ as its designation. The door hissed open, revealing a figure dressed in all white. 

Her dark brown hair was pulled into buns on either side of her face. Her mouth was pulled into a firm line. She looked angry, as if she was ready to pull the Empire apart by her bare hands if she could.

Then the imagery changed again. They were standing in the middle of a cave. A fire, slowly dying out, illuminated them by cast nearly everything else into shadow.

Standing in front of the fire with his back against the wall was a man with a full face visor on. His head bobbed up, as though he heard something.

A strong blast of wind entered the cave, extinguishing the fire and leaving them in the dark. Cassian looked around for a light source, but found none. 

A few seconds ticked past with nothing but silence. Suddenly, a noise filled the darkness. A chill ran down Cassian's spine as the sound grew in intensity…

It was the sound of mechanical breathing, cold and desolate. A sound that could reign terror on its own. One that could make some of the best and bravest soldiers freeze in fear.

Cassian had seen the holovids and recordings taken from battles that the man himself had joined in on...that sound only meant one thing.

_ Vader _ .

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please remember to leave kudos and comments if you so feel like it: I really appreciate it <3


	6. Warnings From the Force

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bodhi grows increasingly worried about his friends' disappearance and Sabine tries to comfort him. Meanwhile, Jyn and Cassian reel from the vision that they shared...and they discover they are not alone in the Jedi Temple....

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this was suppose to be up yesterday (even more technical, it should've been up last Tuesday) but this month has been pretty rough IRL and I was just too exhausted to post yesterday. But now it is, yay! Major kudos to Nor (hanorganaas) for betaing again for me and threatening me with Poe related angst when necessary (she knows my weaknesses).
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this chapter!

The blizzard hadn't let up yet.

Bodhi Rook eyed the storm as he chewed away his bottom lip. He was worried. Cassian and Jyn had been gone for too long…

It had almost been three hours since Bodhi woke up and noticed the two had disappeared. He had searched the entire ship for them, but found no trace of them. When he finally woke up Hera and Sabine to let them know, an unreadable expression passed over her face and she then excused herself shortly after. 

Sabine did her best to keep Bodhi calm; they played a couple games of Sabaac (though Sabine won most of them), talked a bit about old holofilms they’d seen, until Bodhi finally decided to start the repairs on  _ the Ghost. _

Fixing things had always calmed his nerves. It was something he discovered by accident. He walked in on a fight between his parents when he was seven years old. Immediately, he ran back to his room. His breathing laboured as though he had run a marathon and his stomach all clenched up like he had drank a bad batch of blue milk. All of the children he knew often talked of their parents fighting, arguments they weren't suppose to hear. Bodhi's parents, however; rarely argued, and when they did it would be in good jest.

Unsure of what he should do, Bodhi had picked up one of his broken toys and started to tinker with it. Within a few moments, his toy was fixed completely and the knots in his stomach evaporated.

_ The Ghost _ however _ , _ was doing more harm to his nerves than good. Bodhi turned his attention away from the storm and back to the panel in front of him which he’d been working on it for the past ten minutes.

Suddenly, Bodhi yelped and jumped away as a series of sparks exploded from the panel. It was the second time such an event occurred and its reach was far greater the second time than the first.

“Blaster bolts…” he murmured, scratching the back of his head. He knew fixing  _ the Ghost _ would not be an easy task, especially with his lack of supplies and tools needed, but Bodhi never imagined it would be this difficult.

After a few more failed attempts on the panel, Bodhi stalked away from it and sat down with a heavy sigh.

He had been doing good...he had stayed busy since Scarif. He attempted to focus on the fact that Cassian and Jyn were alive, and after that he turned his attention on Kanan Jarrus.

But now, it felt like everything he had gone through in the past few days finally caught up with him. The torture…Galen’s death…almost being caught in an explosion.

His heart began to race wildly in his chest and he legs felt wobbly. He even felt it in a sitting position. He squeezed his eyes shut and tried to focus on something, anything, else.

“They'll be back.”

Bodhi twisted around. The first thing he saw was Sabine standing beside him, looking ahead out toward the snowy hills. The first time he met her, back on Scarif, he guessed she was around seventeen or eighteen. 

Now, she looked older than her years. The brightly colored designs on her armor, the brave smile she gave and the quick comebacks she had were just a facade. Bodhi could tell the war had taken its toll on her.

“How do you know?” Bodhi asked, wringing his hands together. 

Sabine sat down beside him.

“Do you think they're alive?” Sabine asked.

Bodhi nodded.

“Good. Because they are...and when they get back here, I am going to tell you I told you so.” Sabine declared.

“You’re awfully confident.” Bodhi said, with his eyebrow raised.

“What can I say? I’m used to impossible odds.” Sabine replied with a reassuring smile.

Bodhi gave an unconvinced nod and turned to look back out at the storm. The was unease making a home for itself at the pit of his stomach. 

“Yeah, well...I’ve got a bad feeling about this.” Bodhi murmured.

* * *

Jyn hit the ground hard, her heart pounding in her chest. She was dizzy, disoriented. Her skin crawled at the mere memory of the sound she heard at the end of the vision...mechanical breathing.

It took a few seconds for her senses to normalize and Jyn looked around her. She prayed that they were in the temple and not halfway across the galaxy. Her eyes fell on Cassian. The Captain was trying to prop himself up with his arms. At some point, he must’ve fallen face first into the ground, judging from the snow mixed in with his scruff.

Jyn made her way toward him and helped him stand. He swayed and looked faintly sick for a moment. A mere few seconds later, however; he steadied.

“What in the name of Corellia...was  _ that _ ?” Cassian gasped.

“ _ It was a vision, of course.”  _ A voice said. 

Jyn reached for her blaster and swore when she realized she hadn't brought one. If things went south, she would have to fight by hand. 

“Who’s there?” Jyn called out.

“ _ Of all the questions to ask, Jyn Erso, and you ask the most mundane? My, I am disappointed. But if you insist on asking, I am a...fragment of the Force, shall we say. A ghost, even.” _

Cassian shuddered beside her. At Jyn’s questioning gaze, he shrugged. 

“I never liked ghost stories.” the Captain muttered as he folded his arms across his chest. He turned to the ghost and called out, “Why are we here?”

“ _ Isn't it obvious? To face your demons.”  _ The voice replied, sounding amused. “ _ Cassian is the man who regrets...so many slain by his hands…” _

Cassian's expression went stony. The warmth in his eyes faded. His posture had straightened as well, like a soldier at attention. 

“ _ Jyn...the woman who has lost and  _ is  _ lost. You’ve never trusted anyone because everyone you have has either failed you or left you.” _

“No offense but I’m not going to be taking life advice from a disembodied voice.” Jyn snapped.

“How did we even  _ see _ those visions?” Cassian asked, looking around the room to figure out where the voice was coming from. “We’re not Force sensitive.”

“ _ Your theory about the crystal was correct. Your prolonged exposure to it and its sensitivity has made you more susceptible to the visions.” _ The voice replied. It sounded like a man speaking. His voice was deep and calming.

“Were they true?” Jyn asked, thinking back to her vision of Cassian sacrificing himself to save her.

“ _ Sometimes visions can have meanings that can be mistaken...what you saw may not come to pass at all. Sometimes the Force just gives you a warning.” _

“Our warning for what?” Cassian demanded.

_ “To not fear. Jyn has shut herself away from the reality of our galaxy and distrusts anyone who dares to enter her life. She fears betrayal and abandonment.” _

Each word hit Jyn like a blaster bolt. To have a stranger, one she couldn't even  _ see _ , understand her on such a fundamental level…No one knew how deep those wounds were. Cassian was the only person who even  _ knew _ those feelings were there...

“People are betrayed all the time. Nothing to write home about.” Jyn replied, keeping her voice level. 

“ _ Your tongue is sharp.” _ chuckled the voice. “ _ But you miss my point. Such is the way with children these day. Your fear of betrayal and abandonment will lead to failure and the death of your friends if you are not careful. You must trust them, and the Force.” _

“I already trust them.” Jyn retorted stubbornly.

There was a long stretch of silence. It lasted for a few moments before being cut off by an exasperated sigh. “ _ Do you, Jyn? Do you really?” _

Jyn opened her mouth to reply  _ yes _ , but realized she couldn't. The truth was she trusted Cassian and Bodhi, but she didn't trust Hera and Sabine. She didn't know if they would abandon her, like Saw had done so many years ago.

After her silence went on for several seconds, the voice tutted as though that was the answer they expected. Jyn turned to Cassian, but he immediately looked away as an expression of hurt flashed across his face.

Jyn winced, realizing her mistake. She couldn’t, however; find the right words to prove to him, now, that she trusted him after all they’d been through. 

“ _ And Cassian, of course, fears that he is not a good man with the amount of blood on his hands...afraid that he is no better than the evil he fights daily.” _

Jyn felt another wave of guilt. Her mind turned back to  how she compared him to a stormtrooper after her father's death

“ _ These fears will hold you back...they will cause your downfall. You must defeat your fears to be victorious.” _ The voice stated.

“Why are you telling us this?” Jyn demanded, feeling overwhelmed. The voice made it sound like an  _ easy _ task. Nothing about this was easy. 

“ _ You gave the galaxy hope again...I thought you could use a gift in return. The Force has given you a second chance, do not waste it. Goodbye, Cassian Andor and Jyn Erso. May the Force be with you, always.” _

Then, just like that, the room fell silent. The powerful and warm presence of the voice had left. She and Cassian were now alone.

Jyn turned to Cassian, not quite sure of what to say. She tried again to figure out the words to say to him. However before she could, Cassian looked away. 

“We should get going.” he said gruffly. 

Jyn felt a pang of disappointment, but she pushed it away and nodded.

She was more than ready to go back to  _ the Ghost. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus the Adventures of Rebelcaptain and the Temple of Angst is concluded! Or is it? 
> 
> Remember to leave kudos/comment & review--it means a lot to the writer (seriously I typically bounce around when I see em)!


	7. Trust Goes Both Ways

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Following the events in the Jedi Temple, Jyn scrambles to make things right between her and Cassian.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter seven???????? Quite honestly I am astounded that the fic is already this far in? It's really getting away from me, hah.
> 
> Anyway, major thanks to Nor (hanorganaas) for being a total rockstar and beta-ing this for me! And thanks to everyone who keeps coming back for more of this story!

The journey back to the Ghost was filled with silence. Cassian kept a good distance between the two of them. Far enough so that there was no reason for them to speak to each other, but close enough as to not lose each other in the storm.

Jyn watched him regretfully, wishing that she could take back everything she had left unsaid in that temple. She expected him to understand what she’d been thinking, but she realized it too late that her silence only meant that she didn’t trust him.

And that was a load of bantha fodder.

Jyn hadn’t trusted anyone, or let anyone in, since Saw Gurrera abandoned her all those years ago. She  learned to survive on her own, to watch her own back. By the time she was seventeen, she had more blood on her hands than any other.

Eventually, the war became white noise to her. It took everything from her and she wanted to be done with it for good. So she had kept her head down, ignoring the Imperial flags around her.

Hell, the only reason she wound up forging Imperial documents was because she needed them for a ship to get off-world; to escape and make a new name for herself. But she got caught and then she had met Cassian, and he was infuriatingly by-the-book but also incredibly stubborn. He was committed to the cause, willing to cross lines others weren’t. He understood her in a way no one else could. He knew what it was like to lose everything at a young age, to be forced to commit acts for the greater good: to hear screams and see bodies every time you closed your eyes.

Apologies swirled around in her head, but they were all half-assed. She wasn’t sure how to make things right. She wasn’t even sure if she could manage an apology. All Jyn knew was that she couldn’t stand the idea of Cassian being hurt and her being the cause of it.

Steeling her nerves, Jyn jogged to catch up with Cassian. She fell into place at his side and the feeling of closeness sent a feeling of warmth through her entire body. Things felt right when she was at his side, like she was always meant to be here. 

“Can we talk?” Jyn asked, trying to catch Cassian’s eye and failing considerably. Seconds ticked passed without a reply. Jyn internally groaned and added, “Please?”

Perhaps it was the shock that Jyn could be polite at times or he just wasn’t in the mood for her to get so irritated by him ignoring her that she would really start to annoy him, but whatever the reason, Cassian halted immediately and turned to her with a sharp look on his face. 

“What, Jyn?” Cassian said, folding his arms and watching her with an expression not all that dissimilar to the one he had when they first met: judgmental and observant. Someone who didn’t know Cassian better would just think he was being condescending, but his eyes gave it away. Even for a spy, Cassian had extremely expressive eyes.

Jyn faltered. A dozen different explanations and lies came jumping to the forefront of her mind, but they all fell flat. She needed to be honest with Cassian, one hundred percent. Finally, just as it seemed like Cassian was going to lose his patience and stalk away, Jyn blurted, “Trust isn’t easy for me, alright? What I meant was that I don’t trust Sabine and Hera. I wish I could, but I can’t. But you and Bodhi? I trust you with my  _ life _ , and I have done before. Cassian, we nearly died in each other’s arms...do you really think after all the shit we’ve been through together, that I still don’t trust you?”

Cassian’s expression softened. His eyes lit up with what looked achingly like hope. Jyn wanted to see that in his eyes more often, and if it meant fighting the tyranny of the Empire, then so be it. She would fight a thousand armies if it meant giving Cassian Andor hope.

“Trust isn’t something I’m use to having,” Cassian said slowly, “and I’m not used to having people that I...that I care about. It’s been a lonely twenty years, but the last few weeks haven’t been so bad no that I have you by my side.”

It took all Jyn had not to duck away from the intensity from his gaze. Despite the maelstrom of snow around them, she felt warm all over. Her heart fluttered in her chest. Her eyes flicked down Cassian’s face and down to his lips then back up again.

_ This is ridiculous. You’ve only known him for a few weeks, pull yourself together, Jyn. _

“I think we all know it’s  _ you  _ that’s been on  _ my  _ side,” Jyn said, trying for flippancy, but it fell flat. Even so, it diffused the tension between them when Cassian let out a laugh. It was quite possibly the most beautiful sound Jyn ever heard.

“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” Cassian said with an almost wistful look to his face. Jyn felt a distinct swooping feeling in her stomach. The look on the captain’s  face was too much...it all felt like too much for a friend apologizing to her friend.

Was that what they were, friends? Or were they more like partners? Jyn couldn’t imagine her life without Cassian. Even in the brief moments that she had been forced to imagine it, she had been shattered. 

“Neither would I,” Jyn mumbled as she ducked her head. She could still  _ feel _ Cassian looking at her, even with her eyes not upon him. She nearly jumped when she felt a hand touch hers. Jyn looked up in surprise at the random show of affection. At her puzzled expression, Cassian shrugged. 

Chewing  at her bottom lip, Jyn threaded her fingers through his and squeezed. Together, without a word, they continued their trek through the snow. But to Jyn, the silence was filled with a million unasked questions, all buzzing through her mind.

* * *

 

Cassian was both relieved and disappointed when they finally caught sight of _ the Ghost _ . On one hand, it meant they could finally get out of the snow. On the other hand, it meant that whatever the hell was brewing between him and Jyn was going to end.

He could see two figures outside; one was working furiously on repairs. The other sat atop of a crate, legs swinging. Finally, when details became more apparent, Cassian was able to see that it was Bodhi and Sabine.

As soon as she spotted them, Sabine hopped off her crate and tapped Bodhi repeatedly on the shoulder to get his attention. The pilot raised his goggles, turning off the torch in his hand as he turned to see what Sabine was pointing at. The moment his eyes laid on Cassian and Jyn, they went as wide as saucers and a grin split across his face.

“Oh thank the stars,” Bodhi breathed, rushing forward to greet them. The force of the embrace was enough to make the captain stumble backwards. It was a foreign feeling--the only person he could truly remember hugging was Jyn on Scarif--but a pleasant one. Cassian returned the hug awkwardly, patting Bodhi’s back for good measure.

The hug ended quickly. Bodhi moved to hug Jyn, who returned it with a wide smile on her face. Bodhi pulled away and stepped back, looking them both up and down. His eyes scanned for injuries. Before he could say anything, Sabine appeared behind him.

“Well, you’re not dead, so congrats on that.” Sabine said dryly, glaring at them. Despite the age difference between them, the young woman was capable of making Cassian feel like a schoolboy in trouble with the principal. Judging from the look on Jyn’s face, she felt the same way. Cassian wondered if Sabine got that talent from the year she spent on Mandalore. 

“What Sabine means is we’re glad you’re back,” Bodhi said, wringing his hands together.

“No, what Sabine said is what Sabine means,” the Mandalorian replied, glaring at Bodhi.  The pilot stepped back from her. She turned back to face Cassian and Jyn. “Where the hell were you?”

Jyn turned to share a glance with Cassian. To a stranger his expression would’ve been unreadable, but Jyn knew him well enough to know that he was silently telling her it was her choice to tell the others what had happened. Jyn felt a wave of affection wash over her regarding Cassian.

The idea of telling these two strangers what had happened in the temple felt dangerous. If they proved to be untrustworthy, then they would know what Jyn’s weaknesses were. Worse, if they were trustworthy, she could practically imagine the pity they would look at her with after the tale of her vision. But didn’t Disembodied Force Man say that she needed to learn to trust and if she didn’t, it would result in the downfall of she and her friends?

“It’s probably best to explain inside where it’s warm,” Jyn said in a tight voice. Her hand trembled slightly at her side and just before she could stuff it in her pocket to hide it. Cassian took her hand in his. 

Instantly, the weight on her chest dissipated. she was suddenly hit by the realization that she wasn’t alone anymore. She had someone to trust, someone to confide in, someone who  _ understood  _ her. Understood what drove her, understood what it was like to love and to have lost…

She would always have Cassian at her side; the Empire and the Death Star had tried to take him away from her, but both had failed. The universe, possibly even the Force, had decided that they were a good team. So far, it hadn’t let them be separated yet.

Sabine watched them for a moment with a puzzled expression on her face. Soon a look of understanding appeared. As the Mandalorian turned to head up the ramp, she paused briefly to wink at Jyn. 

_ What in Correlia was that about?  _ Jyn wondered as she, Cassian and Bodhi made their way inside to the cargo bay. Sabine led the way, up the ladder and into the second deck of the ship.

Hera was sitting in the lounge area with a glass in her hand. As soon as she spotted them, she stood. She made her way to them with a warm expression and a bright smile. Jyn felt an unexpected wave of affection wash over her toward the general. 

“I’m glad that you’re both safe, although I don’t appreciate the fact that the two of you decided to wander off during the middle of a blizzard without telling us.” Hera said sternly, her green eyes landing on Jyn, as people had so often done in the young brunette’s lifetime.  

“We didn’t have much choice in the matter, General.” Cassian said with confidence. Sometimes Jyn forgot that Cassian was used to being in and around the military. The closet thing Jyn had to experience came from being with Saw, but his group didn’t use formalities like the Rebellion did.

“You were forced to leave?” Hera asked as her eyes trailed behind Jyn and Cassian, as if expecting a horde of stormtroopers to appear behind them. 

Cassian turned to Jyn. He didn’t want to say anything she didn’t want him to, which meant he expected her to explain things.

“It might be best if we all sat down,” Jyn said, motioning toward the table. “I don’t suppose you’ve got anything with alcohol?” 

“We don’t carry alcohol on  _ the Ghost, _ ” Hera said, leaving the room. She entered the small kitchenette to get something from the refrigeration unit, “but you’re welcome to our stock of Blue Milk.” 

Jyn fought back the urge to smile: the blue beverage was one of the many things that she missed about home. Some of her fondest memories from those days were of her and her parents gathered around the kitchen table. Her mother’s eyes were alight as her father told a terrible joke.

“I’ll take a shot of that, barkeep.” Jyn quipped as she followed Hera into the kitchenette. It was slightly larger than an average broom closet, with a table in the corner and lots of cabinets. She searched until she found the glasses. The brunette grabbed one glass, then a second and walked toward the doorway. She waved her free hand to get Cassian’s attention and she pointed at the second glass for him to grab. Cassian nodded once.

“Make it two, Hera.” Jyn added with too much bravado to just be talking about a drink. In the corner of her eye, she saw Cassian roll his eyes and fight off a smile. 

She smiled and headed back into the kitchenette, holding out the two glasses for Hera to pour the blue milk in, while still thinking about Cassian’s smile.

_ He needs to smile more,  _ Jyn thought suddenly,  _ he’s incredibly handsome when he does. _

Immediately, her cheeks flushed as she realized what she was thinking. She nearly tipped over one of the glasses as Hera poured the Blue Milk into it. The Twi’liek raised an eyebrow, looking suspicious, but made no comment of the brunette’s blunder. Jyn was merciful for that.

Without another word, Jyn and Hera left the kitchenette to rejoin the others at the table. Cassian was sitting next to Bodhi. The two were chatting over with Sabine, who had neglected to sit at the table but instead was sitting atop of a crate. Her legs kept swinging back and forth. Jyn noticed that the Mandalorian still wasn’t moving her wounded arm much. 

The entire room fell silent as they sat down. Jyn felt her stomach twist into knots as she realized they now expected her to tell them what happened. Having to tell a tale where her agency had been taken away from her--however briefly through her first trek in the snow--and then the vision she had witnessed of everyone she loved dying?

It was agonizing enough to witness once and to have to recount it, was excruciating. 

Jyn pulled the Kyber Crystal out from underneath her shirt; Hera took a sharp intake of breath at the the sight of it. Sabine’s brown eyes widened.

“Is...that what I think it is?” Sabine asked, looking back and forth between Jyn, Bodhi and Hera.

“It’s a Kyber Crystal,” Jyn confirmed. “My mother gave it to me just before she died. As you know, Kyber Crystals are used for lightsabers--”

“And the Death Star.” Bodhi said softly, his dark eyes lowered. His expression was suddenly weary. 

Jyn released the crystal from her grip so that it fell back against the fabric of her shirt. “It’s Force sensitive. And somehow...it...led me to a temple not far from here. It was like...getting to the temple was the only thing that mattered to me. Anything and anyone else, no matter how important, were just obstacles in front of my goal.”

Cassian shifted slightly next to her. When Jyn looked at him inquiringly, he didn’t meet her eyes,and began his side of the story. “When I caught up with her, I tried to get her to come back to the ship, but the pull was too strong. She didn’t even recognize me.”

It felt like all the air had escaped from her lungs in one blow Jyn stared at Cassian, stung by how he made it sound as dull as the weather and as though it didn’t matter. But then she noticed that the hand he kept beneath the table was pulled into a tight fist, so that his knuckles had gone white.

It was a facade, Jyn realized. He was pretending that it hadn’t mattered.That the way she had acted under the spell of the Force hadn’t alarmed or upset him. But she remembered the look of relief on his face when she had woken up from it. How he had held her in her arms and how safe she had felt then, despite everything. She could almost feel the ghost of his lips from where he’d kissed the side of her head…

Without thinking, Jyn reached forward and took Cassian’s hand that was hidden under the table. She moved it so that his palm was pressed against hers before lacing their fingers together. Cassian squeezed her hand in return.

“What happened when you got out of the trance?” Sabine asked, bringing Jyn back to the here and now.

“We entered the temple, of course.” Jyn said, “And then we realized it wasn’t just any kind of temple...it was a Jedi temple.”

The entire room fell silent for several seconds. Then it was broken when Jyn heard Bodhi whisper, “Holy Corellia.”

“Then the entrance sealed up behind us and we got separated,” Cassian said taking over. “And...I saw the Inquisitor.” 

Jyn instinctively tightened her grip on Cassian’s hand as her eyebrows knitted together. She had seen things that had already happened to her (with the exception of Cassian’s “death”), so why hadn’t Cassian?

Unless he had…

Jyn suddenly recalled how he had stiffened when Bodhi had described what an Inquisitor was to her earlier. That didn’t mean anything; however, perhaps he was just bothered by what an Inquisitor was meant to do. But then this was the same man who had killed so many times in the name of the Rebellion...what  _ could  _ bother him?

“He taunted me for awhile and then I realized it was an hallucination. I heard Jyn scream, so I ran to find her.” Cassian finished abruptly. The lack of details in his recollection was startling and it made Jyn want to know all the more. She, however, wasn’t about to ask in front of a crowd of people.

“Meanwhile...I was forced to relive the moment that my mother, my father, and Saw died. And...and then I saw...I saw…”

_ Just as the lightsaber was about to pierce her heart, someone jumped in front of her. The lightsaber went through his chest. The beam of light disappeared completely and Cassian fell to the floor at her feet-- _

“I can’t do this,” Jyn blurted as she stood up abruptly. Hera, Sabine and Bodhi stared at her with pity and worry. It was too much and-

_ He was gone, he was gone, he was gone, he wasn’t suppose to die, he couldn’t die, she couldn’t let it happen… _

Suddenly feeling as if the walls were caving in around her, Jyn turned and ran out of the room. She slid down the ladder and didn’t stop until she was in the cargo bay. She choked back a sob as she leaned against a crate for support. 

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair that the universe kept taking people she loved away from her. It wasn’t fair that she had to watch her mother and father die in front of her and it wasn’t fair that she hadn’t even gotten a proper goodbye with Saw.

It wasn’t fair that Cassian could die saving her. 

None of it was fair.

This whole goddamn war had destroyed her life, her world, and it kept taking and taking. Gods, it wouldn’t stop. Why wouldn’t it stop? Why couldn’t she just, for once in her miserable life, be  _ happy? _

Cassian made her happy. He made her heart race and made her smile. He made her feel safe and it wasn’t fair that she was finally getting to feel those things when they might get ripped away from her.

She pulled her knees up to her chest, feeling more like the little girl who lost her parents than the woman who had just done the impossible by stealing the Death Star plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here I thought the angst was over...guess not!
> 
> Remember to leave kudos/comment & review--it means a lot to the writer (seriously it's make my day)!


	8. What Will We Become?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hera and Jyn have a heart to heart about war, and Jyn comes to terms with her identity.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *shows up two months late without Starbucks*
> 
> Well, that was a longer hiatus than expected! I really didn't intend for it to be that long, but life got in the way.
> 
> I hope you all enjoy this chapter, regardless of the wait!
> 
> Also, I changed my username. I am now jadesolo instead of theskyesquake!

Hera listened intently and silently as Jyn and Cassian began their tale of what happened inside the Temple. It seemed peculiar to her that they were led to a Jedi Temple on their way to rescue Kanan. To her, it felt as if the Force loved to present itself as an enigma wrapped up in a mystery, never giving straight answers to those who asked-- and occasionally those who did not.

Cassian finished his side of the story, carefully leaving out details. Hera wasn’t entirely surprised, given what happened during his last encounter with an Inquisitor.

Jyn looked curiously at Cassian, but said nothing. She turned back to the rest of the group and said, “Meanwhile...I was forced to relive the moment that my mother, my father, and Saw Guerra died. And….and then I saw...I saw…”

Her expression went blank and her eyes flicked over toward Cassian for the briefest of seconds. Abruptly, Jyn stood from the table and let out a hoarse, “I can’t do this,” and dashed out of the room and down to the cargo bay.

Almost immediately, Cassian stood up to follow her but Hera held up a hand. Cassian looked back and forth between Hera and the ladder for several seconds before his gaze finally held on her. “I can’t just let her go through this alone.”

“Captain Andor, let me handle this.” Hera said calmly. As Cassian opened his mouth to argue, Hera said loudly, “That’s an order, Captain.”

Cassian stared at her for a few seconds, still looking as if he wanted to protest, but he backed away slowly and sank back down into his seat. He kept his eyes trained firmly on the table.

Hera stood to follow Jyn, pausing briefly to whisper to Sabine, “Watch him.”

Sabine looked at her with surprise then nodded once. Without another word, Hera made her way to the cargo bay.

It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Cassian Andor, she did. He was one of the finest intelligence officers the Rebellion had, he was practical and resourceful, the kind of soldier they needed. But when it came to Jyn Erso, Cassian’s logic wasn’t as sound. He would try to comfort and protect her in anyway he could, possibly without realizing that his comfort wasn’t the kind she needed right now.

Jyn sat on the floor, her knees drawn up to her chest, her shoulders shaking as she cried silently. It was unjust that the Empire had made grief a common friend to the far too young.

_ Then again, how many times have I found myself in the exact same position?  _ Hera wondered silently as she sat down next to the crying brunette.

Jyn stilled, but made no other sign that she was aware of Hera’s presence.

_ She’s waiting,  _ Hera thought,  _ waiting to see what I’ll do. _

The second Hera had seen Jyn, she had her pegged as the kind who couldn’t trust easily; it was an excellent survival skill, especially in these times, but it’d earn Jyn few points elsewhere.

Casting away mental images of another dark haired child, Hera thought carefully of what to say. Hera had the nagging suspicion that no matter what she said, Jyn wouldn’t believe it.

_ Can’t hurt to try. _

“Whatever you saw in the temple might not happen,” Hera said in a gentle voice. “The Force has a habit of twisting the truth to fit the eye of the beholder. Whatever vision you saw wasn’t the whole truth. You don’t know the context of it. It could just be a manifestation of your fear.”

Jyn stayed quiet for a moment, taking in Hera’s words. At last she said, “Why are you down here? Don’t you have General-y things to do?”

“I am doing them. A General isn’t just in command of starships and soldiers, Jyn. We’re also in charge of keeping our squadron alive and healthy, in every way. Back in the Clone Wars, the Clone army called each other brothers, did you know that?”

Jyn nodded by way of answering.

“The Rebellion isn’t perfect, Jyn. Gods know we’ve made many mistakes and we’ll keep on making them, but at our core...we’re a family. We protect each other, we watch each other’s backs. We have to, because no one else will. You’re not alone anymore, Jyn.” said Hera.

Jyn stared at her for a long moment, searching for a lie in Hera’s words, but inevitably coming up empty. The young woman rested her head against the durasteel behind them, looking far more weary than any person her age should.

“Having attachments means you can lose them,” she said weakly, as though she no longer believed it herself. “Wouldn’t it be better to be alone?”

“I think you already know the answer to that.” Hera replied quietly.

Jyn stared at her for a long moment, skepticism slowly fading away into trust. Jyn stretched out her legs and let go of the necklace she had been clinging to. The crystal fell back against the fabric of her shirt, the fluorescent lights above reflecting off it.

“I still haven’t told you what happened in the temple,” Jyn said wearily. “About my vision...the other vision Cassian and I shared.”

“I don’t need to hear about your vision, if the cost of retelling it is so great for you. Battles leave scars, some you can’t see. And those...those hurt the most.”

“How do you deal with them?” Jyn asked.

Hera bit her lip, thinking of the ghosts that still haunted her today, of pilots, soldiers, and Jedi alike.

“I’ll let you know when I find out.” Hera answered at last.

* * *

After their talk, Hera ordered Jyn to make use of one of the rooms. Jyn, too tired to protest, had weakly agreed and marched into the nearest bunk and crawled into bed. She tossed and turned, finding the bed too soft for her liking. How had she not noticed that the first night here?

Letting out a huff of frustration, Jyn snatched the pillow and hopped off the bed and made a small palette on the floor. After a few seconds of moving around, trying to find the most comfortable position, Jyn finally closed her eyes.

Questions whirled around her head, a tunsami of thoughts threatening to drown her. Why had she survived Scarif, what did her vision mean? Was Alderaan truly lost?

But she kept coming back to one in particular, one thought that had quietly nagged at her since she had come face to face with Krennic...no, earlier than that. Since the Council meeting. Since she and Cassian’s fight after her father's death:

Who was she?

She had defiantly told Orson Krennic that she was Jyn Erso, daughter of Galen and Lyra Erso. It was a title and an identity she had forced away for so long, had hidden it away in a small hatch in the back of her mind.

But she had taken the name--the name the Rebellion called her after so long, the name that sounded like a prayer on Cassian’s lips--and claimed it as her own, in the end. Because it was her name.

Still, she felt that she so much more than just Jyn Erso: the lost girl with no family. Because she did have a family now, Jyn realized. They had stood beside her when it mattered, and that made them family. Granted, it was a small and rough around the edges family, but it was  _ enough. _

She had a family now and that was wonderful, but it also gave her a commitment. A commitment to them and, by extension, the Rebellion. A month ago, she would have scoffed at the idea of being with the Rebellion, but now?

She had fought her own personal demons, had stolen the Death Star plans, and sent them off for whoever was still out there listening.

And there was still a battle to be fought, a war to be won.

Jyn stood up, unable to sleep. Eyes blazing with purpose.

She had a family, she had a commitment, she had her name again.

She was Sergeant Jyn Erso of the Rebellion, daughter of Galen Erso and Lyra Erso. She was no longer the lost little girl. She was a soldier with a family to protect.

And god help anyone, Inquisitor or otherwise, who dared to mess with them.

* * *

“And you’re absolutely sure?” Cassian repeated, peering over Bodhi’s shoulder at the counsel that looked, to him, as though it had been haphazardly put together a billion times over. 

They were in the cockpit of the Ghost, where apparently most of the internal damage had occurred. Bodhi was lying on his back, tool in hand as he worked on fixing something that was, apparently, connected to the counsel Cassian was suppose to be looking at.

“Yes, Captain.” Bodhi stressed. “As soon as I finish this counsel, which should only take a few moments now, the  _ Ghost  _ will be ready to fly again. Assuming Hera’s finished with her outdoor repairs, that is.”

For the first time in an hour, Cassian allowed himself to smile. “Finally,” he said, patting the fabric of the captain’s chair, “a bit of good news. I’ll tell General Syndulla.”

Cassian moved to leave when Bodhi’s voice stopped him.

“She’ll be alright, you know. Jyn, I mean. Between everything that’s happened before the mission, during the mission, and whatever happened in that temple…” Bodhi  paused in his repairs, before pulling himself from out beneath the counsel. “We’ve all gone through hell, Cassian. You can’t expect anyone to do that and not come back out without a few demons.”

Cassian wanted to shout that he  _ knew _ that, that he had had demons since he was old enough to be put on dangerous missions that always ended in death (but never his own). He had shouldered the responsibilities the Rebellion had put on him with a quiet determination, he had squeezed the trigger of his rifle so many times that it was second nature, and it was  _ hell _ and he hated to do it but someone had to.

He had so many ghosts that haunted him that he never thought there was any room for any demons to haunt him as well. There was. And his came in the form of a dark robed man with a crimson lightsaber.

“How are you staying so calm?” Cassian asked, thinking of the wrong people dying and the vision he had shared with Jyn.

“I’m  _ terrified _ ,” Bodhi breathed. “I’m terrified we’ll be stranded on this planet forever, that we’ll never make it to Takodana. But mostly I’m just  _ numb _ . I had the chance to save Jedha, but I was too late. I was too late and now Jedha is  _ gone _ .”

Cassian fought the urge to look away. He knew that they were already too late, that very soon Alderaan would be destroyed as well.

“Sending off the Death Star plans didn’t...didn’t erase the guilt of my failure. I was too late to get you to Eadu, to stop them from firing that bloody weapon in the first place. But if I focus on the losses, and my fear, then I’ll have more failures. If I focus on fixing this--” he motioned at the wires in the panel, “Then we can leave this blasted planet and go save Kanan, and maybe I won’t be too late this time.”

“So you’re just prioritizing,” Cassian said softly.

“Basically,” Bodhi replied stiffly, crawling back underneath the counsel to finish his work. “But it works, so it’s better than nothing.”

Cassian nodded, then left the room as quietly as possible.

* * *

Jyn stared herself in the mirror she’d found after rummaging through drawers, and  turned her head from left to right, trying to figure out if she was happy with her new look.

The scissors were still in her hands and bits of her hair was scattered across  the floor (she’d have to clean up in a bit). Her hair, which once fell past her shoulders whenever it was down, was cropped short. The tips of her hair were a bit choppy, from her lack of experience cutting hair.

She wasn’t even sure where the sudden urge for change had come from, but it had come with a fiery impulse, one she had quickly indulged.

Jyn sat the scissors down and picked up the clothes Sabine had given her. They were dark gray and black, simple but looked mobile enough for a fight. Jyn quickly changed out of her old ones and into the new ones.

She admired the black armor Sabine had also brought. Jyn couldn’t tell if they were Mandalorian or not (she also wasn't sure if sharing armor was against the Mandalorian rule book).

Quickly, Jyn fastened the chest plate and blaster holster, and pulled on her fingerless gloves. Takodana was known to bring in a crowd, so she had to be prepared for anything. Especially with this Inquisitor around.

A knock on the door interrupted her thoughts. She moved to open it and found Cassian on the other side. He faltered in whatever it was that he’d been about to say, eyes honing in on her new, shorter hair. Then his eyes trailed up and down her body, taking in the new clothes.

“Y-you look different,” he mumbled, still staring at her with a dumbfounded expression.

Jyn titled her head up and in a bout of bravado, asked, “Good different or bad different?”

“Good. Very good.”

Jyn felt her breath hitch and found her eyes trained on Cassian’s lips. With a great deal of difficulty, she dragged her gaze up back to his eyes, which were still trained at her with such an intensity that she wanted to look away.

She didn’t.

Seconds ticked by, dragging into an eternity, the pair of them trapped in the abyss of each other’s eyes, both too afraid to take the step forward.

“Are you okay?” Cassian asked, breaking the trance. “I wanted to check on you, but Hera went instead.”

_ Probably best she did,  _ Jyn thought. Talking to Cassian always eased her mind, but she doubted even he could still her fears of losing him. It didn't sound fair for him, either.

“I'm good, Hera has a way with words.” Jyn replied. She clung to the hope that Hera was right and the vision wasn't true, just a false image warning her of something else.

Cassian stared at her for a moment, his brown eyes trained on her with intense concern. Making sure she wasn't lying, Jyn realized. When had he developed the ability to read her like a book?

At last he seemed satisfied and he dropped his gaze. “The repairs are finished,” he said quietly. “We’re taking off to Takodana now.”

“Good,” Jyn said, eager to steer the conversation away from her meltdown, “I’m so tired of ice planets.”

Cassian gave a weak smile, “Lucky for you, Takodana has a jungle climate.”

“Because nothing bad has  _ ever _ happened to us in a jungle climate before.” Jyn remarked sardonically, thinking of the tall trees on the sandy beaches of Scarif and the acrid smell of smoke that had tinged the air as she and Cassian had stumbled their way toward the beach just as the Death Star fired upon the small paradise.

Cassian’s smile evaporated instantly and he stepped into her room.

Regretting that she had even brought it up, Jyn closed the door and followed him to the bed, where he had gone to sit down.

She put her hand on his shoulder, rubbing her thumb over the rough fabric of his shirt.

“I keep thinking about Alderaan,” Cassian said, catching her hand with his, pulling it gently off his shoulder and wrapped both of his around hers, staring at them as though it were the most fascinating thing he’d ever seen. “How we sacrificed so much to get those plans and...it was for nothing.”

He ducked his head and took a deep, shuddering breath.

Using her free hand, Jyn took his chin and tilted it upwards, leaning forward so she could look him in the eye for her next words. Her hair, even as short as it now was, fell so that it was curtaining them away from the rest of the world.

“Alderaan might be lost, but that doesn’t mean our sacrifice was in vain. Maybe we can’t blow up the Death Star today, but tomorrow is another chance. We’ll take all the chances we have until they’re spent, remember?”

“What if they already are?” Cassian asked wearily, his brown eyes round and sparkling. For once, they weren’t crinkled in a friendly way or narrowed in a calculating way. They were soft and weary and  _ sad _ .

“Then we’ll make new ones,” Jyn said forcefully. “The Empire won’t last forever. They may have a ginormous planet killer, but we have a far deadly secret weapon.”

“Which is?” Cassian asked with a quirk of an eyebrow.

“Hope. We have hope.” Jyn answered, finding that she believed it with all her heart now. When Cassian had first proposed the idea that rebellions were built on hope, she had found it frivolous. Rebellions were started when a lot of people were cross about the same thing, that’s what they were built on: righteous anger.

But the longer she spent with him--and by extension, the Rebellion--she found that hope fueled their righteous anger, that it kept them fighting. Because one day, there would be a day with no Empire. No pain and no suffering.

“You believe that now, do you?” Cassian asked with a quiet disbelief. He wasn’t surprised that she believed in the Rebellion now, no. He was surprised that she had believed  _ him. _

“I do. And I always will.” Jyn promised, hoping he’d understand the hidden depth to her words. That she would always believe and trust  _ him _ , no matter what happened.

Cassian gazed at her with that besotted look again; the look that made her heart skip a beat and made her think of the amount of times she almost lost him on Scarif. It was the same way he had looked at her when she told him she trusted him.

Not for the first time, Jyn thought of how much he meant to her. The thought of losing him was enough to shatter her confidence and make her spirit break.

In the short amount of time they had known each other, Cassian had worked his way into her heart. No, that wasn't right. She felt as if he were in her very bones.

“I’ll always believe you, too,” Cassian breathed, his gaze falling away from her eyes and landing on her mouth. He reached up his free hand and cupped her cheek with it.

Her heart thudded in her chest, sounding out an alarmingly fast rhythm. Jyn thought of the elevator on Scarif and how she had had the bizarre urge to kiss him.

She had that feeling again, and this time she didn't want to fight it.

Cassian leaned forward before hesitantly slightly in his movements, faltering in his courage to continue.

Jyn had never been good with being patient.

She moved to close the distance between them, eager to cross the chasm that separated them. It was a chasm filled with fears and abandonment, and for her it smelled of damp earth and sounded like a thunderstorm.

She was done letting things hold her back.

His lips ghosted across hers, igniting every nerve ending in her body.

She wanted this so badly that it scared her. The thought of wanting  _ someone  _ was terrifying. Even more terrifying was the thought that someone wanted her back.

Jyn pushed down her fears and focused solely on the soft pull and push of the kiss, how Cassian's hands held her face so gingerly, like she was the most important person in the galaxy.

A new feeling bubbled in her chest and her gut twisted in pleasurable way, her heart still thudding rapidly in her chest.

She had been kissed before, but never like this. Her previous kisses had been rough and uncomfortable. This, here, with Cassian was soft and meaningful. He held her like she was precious and kissed her like his life depended on it.

It felt right, as alarming as that was.

The ship shuddered violently, bringing them both out of a daze. Cassian pulled away abruptly, obviously trying to figure out what the source of the disturbance was.

Jyn blinked sluggishly, trying to ground herself back into reality. Belatedly, she realized the floor was vibrating.

“We’re taking off.” Cassian said in realization.

Jyn tried to push away the huge weight of disappointment she felt, her lips still tingling from their brief contact with Cassian’s. “Yeah,” she muttered. “Bloody great timing.”

Cassian stared at her regretfully and she realized he felt just as disappointed as she did at their untimely liftoff. “Maybe we should wait just a bit longer on...this.” He made a vague motion between them. “Not too long, just not when we’re...you know…”

“Talking about the inevitable destruction of another planet, and our continuing struggle against the Empire?” Jyn suggested, feigning innocence.

“Yeah,” Cassian said. “Exactly.”

Jyn stood up, dragging Cassian to his feet along with her. “When that happens,” she said as she took a dangerous step forward and whispered into his ear, “Better make it a damn good kiss.”

_ Be one hell of a challenge after that,  _ Jyn  added silently.

With that, she gave him a mischievous smile and left the room. Sabine had a decent stock of weapons and Jyn wanted a trusty blaster at her side for when they landed on Takodana.

_ All in day’s work, _ Jyn thought.  _ Shoot a few stormtroopers, save a Jedi, grab a blaster from a friend, and maybe get to kiss Cassian later. _

Sergeant Jyn Erso smiled.

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to yell at me in the comments! If you have any questions about the fic, you can find me on Tumblr as skywaalker!


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